Classic photography… not!
At first, I had thought that this is a photograph. In reality this is drawn using charcoal as the media on paper by my friend from middle school – Niladri Datta. (You may remember him from my visit to him a few months back to check on him, his family and his parents in Kolkata). None of us were aware of his artistic skills while in school. I think he picked it up as a hobby only a few years back. (That and taking videos while being driven at high speed on roads and also getting drenched in the rain 🙂 ). He takes to his hobby after everybody has gone to sleep at night (once his office and son’s studies and all that has been taken care of) and then posts them on his timeline. It is always a treat for me to wake up in the morning and see a wonderful painting from him.
I am simply amazed by his skills. This particular piece of art is absolutely mind blowing. Just conceiving this mentally and then making such a wonderful figure stand out – not by giving definition with colors – but actually taking definition away from the rest of the picture by putting in the darkness… this is truly awe-inspiring.
Unfortunately he still has not set up a website to share his pictures (he is happy just painting for himself) but I do hope he will set it up so many others can see his creations too.
Oh! another point – any one of you who think that you are too old to start something new, I throw my friend from fifth grade at you!!

Like dad, like son!!
I am often – and of late, increasingly – compared with my dad. Folks who know both of us mention how we look alike, our mannerisms are similar and we apparently, even talk the same way. But when somebody who I have not seen for 34 years, sees me down the street filled with a lot of people and immediately recognizes me simply by how I looked and walked from a distance, I have to believe that there is a lot of truth to what people say.
Yesterday, after all that driving and meetings and getting lost in the trails, it was getting late. But I really really wanted to meet this guy from my past. Unfortunately, I was at least forty minutes from where he was working and he was another forty minutes from his home. You know you were friends with somebody when they say – “Don’t worry. I will be there”. And that meant he had an hour and a half drive back home.
Not knowing how he would look – I had vague memories of Raja (Rajarshi) – I was looking around in the middle of all the boisterous crowds in Reston Towne Center on a Thursday evening – to see if I could spot him. Like I said, I had no need to worry. Even if he did not remember me, he remembered my dad.
The familiar “Bachchuda!” cry (incidentally, Bachchu is what my nickname was in Durgapur – actually still is – but nobody calls me by that name anymore) made me look to my sharp right and there he was – Raja – pretty much looking the same from so many years back. Not losing hair helps a lot!! And his first comment – after seeing me after 34 years – was “Ekabarey Roy-jethur moto”! (“Just like Roy Uncle”).
I was sixteen and he could not have been over ten way back in that February 1982 Saraswati pujo day when I had visited them for the last time. A few years back, we had left the neighborhood. But before leaving the neighborhood, we used to play soccer and cricket together – along with a few other kids from the neighborhood.
I had always wanted to meet him after I located him a year back. In spite of coming to the DC area so often, yesterday was the first time I got some time to meet him.
We told the bar lady that we were meeting after 34 years. She promptly took pictures of us. The rest of the evening, we drew up the neighborhood houses on a napkin and went house by house to see if we remembered everybody from that house and see if we knew where they all were. Many times I would fish out my iPhone, go to my blog and show him pictures of many of those people. In my “Intersection Point” series, I had met them much later, took pictures of and chronicled them in my blog.
The whole evening was like stitching together a rich tapestry of scattered memories from those days. We would recollect something – ask the other – do you remember that? do you remember this? and often would burst out laughing or loudly go – Yes, Yes Yes.
It was a good thing I had told the lady at the bar about our background. Instead of getting irritated every time we got boisterous with our laughter and Bengali, she would come over and take more candid pictures of us on our phones!!
Thank you Raja for taking the pains to drive that long to make it possible for me to meet you. Let’s see if we can pull off that picnic in the same spot from 1980 with all our neighborhood folks one last time in the next few years!!!

Teasing Jay Jay
The surpriser got surprised!!
A couple of years back, Sourav – who went to seventh and eighth grade with me – had crossed the Canadian border with his family to spend a night with myself, my family and my inlaws when we were visiting Niagara Falls. He had become an instant hit with my inlaws with his traditional Bengali style “jomiye adda”.
He was in Atlanta for a couple of days and I had fixed to have dinner and drinks with him downtown. What he did not know is that I had been working on a surprise for him. There is another friend from our seventh and eighth days – Manbir (Manny) who now lives near Columbus, Georgia. I have met both of them only once after leaving school way back in the early eighties. I took a chance and it looked like Manbir might be able to make it this evening. I, however, kept it as a secret from Sourav.
The confusion started when I showed up at 7:45 at the bar that I had told both of them to come to. I went inside the bar but I could not find Manbir. Instead, i ran into Sourav. Imagine, my situation – I am on the phone with Manbir trying to pinpoint his location and Sourav is right in front of me and of course, I did not want him to get wind of it.
Just when this confusion was reigning supreme, a guy walks up to me saying “Isn’t that Rajib”? And I was like – “Abhijit”? Imagine the scene – Sourav standing in front of me wondering who they heck was I trying to locate in the hotel … Manbir talking to me on the phone that by now I had taken off my ears because I was completely bewildered that I was standing in front of a guy I went to Business school with and have never since 1991!!
Eventually, we sorted out everything. Manbir was in the wrong bar. Which was fixed quickly. Sourav was overjoyed to see him for the first time after 1980. Both of them were terrific athletes in our school and there were a lot of stories to remember. In between, I walked up to Abhijit (who was with his friend) to catch up with him too. Finally, before leaving, he came by where we were sitting. I had to ask the bar guy to take a picture of us.
And then we tried to locate some of our old school pictures. Believe it or not, in the lower pictures, the left one is Manbir and the right one has Sourav and me. Did I look nerdy or what?? 🙂
What a great evening it was though!!!

Rounding up the day with the good old Aroras…
The best was kept for the last. Visited Gagan and Bharti at their place. Gagan and I worked together in my first start up experience. We had no kids and the four of us had grown very close. Those start up days demanded so much work, we barely used to go back to our apartments to sleep. Sharmila and Bharti used to come over to our office and I recollect them learning roller blading in the corridors of our office over the weekends while we pounded away at more code. Well, Gagan was pounding away at more code. I was just eating those free chips and food we used to stock up 🙂
One challenge of keeping the Aroras for the last was that we missed a few other i2 friends who were there at their place and had left by the time we came over. We missed Sanjay, Priya, Vijay and Mamtha. We did manage to stop Atanu just as he was escaping!!
Getting to see the three of them and their kids was the best ending of a day in Seattle. For the first time ever, after dragging Natasha and Nikita thru four meetings of our old friends thru the day, even they declared that it was a great day for them too!!!

That was a pleasant surprise!
Next stop was to meet Piyali – Sharmila’s senior from her engineering school – and her family. I remember having met Piyali and her husband – commonly referred to as “PPD” – long long time back when they used to live in Houston. I think our common friends – Indrani and Aniruddha – had brought them over to our place in Dallas. This was way before any one of us kids.
Funnily enough, yesterday, I did not even have to start to find out what common connections we had. We walked into one such immediately as we stepped into their house. Ashok and Bipasha – our dear friends from Dallas – and their daughters were staying with them on their way to Banff! Turns out Ashok and PPD were classmates from their engineering college!!
But the best part was meeting Piyali’s mom. Like every Bengali mom she kept a hawkish eye on my plate and glass. Every time I had finished my food or drink, she would immediately indicate to her daughter to replenish it. Ah! What would we ever do without our Bengali moms and their care in our lives!!

Making new friends!!
Sometimes it is about meeting old friends… sometimes it is about making new ones. We visited Sharmila’s school friend – Saimoon and her family yesterday. I met her and her husband Indranil for the first time. Needless to say, we found out a lot of common friends from our past! The girls – Natasha and Nikita took to Saimoon’s daughters (they are similar age groups) very quickly. We had a great time all around!!

There must be something in the water of Seattle
Met five of our very old friends from Dallas to get this first day in Seattle started in high gear. Four of them were also colleagues from a prior job life. Here is the funny thing – in the fifteen years or so that has gone by, not a single one of them has changed one single bit since I saw them last. Not an ounce put on, not a strand of hair lost… unlike… ahem… yours truly 🙂 I blame Atlanta water for that 🙂
It was great to catch up with Pawan, Rajeev, Bindu, Sanjay and Sansern and the kids!! There were some really funny recollections of the past – the He-Li, She-Li story and the Larry Mason feet traveling in first class to Newark story… to name a few.
I need to come back and spend some more time here…

Ah! those pesky little things called “children”
First day of vacation to celebrate the impending passage of Natasha’s next step in life – leaving us to join college. While many parents have gone thru this phase in their lives, for Sharmila and myself, this will be our first. It will be interesting to see how each one of us internalize this passage of our own lives – the balancing of the joy of seeing her grow to be her own woman on one hand and then breaking out in sweat at night realizing that if we walked over to the other room, she is not going to be there, on the other…
Today, she is going to see some of our very old friends who often helped us manage her when she was a mere baby. Many of them have not seen her since those days (and have never seen Nikita!). It probably will not make a big mark in her mind, but for me, it will be momentous watching those “intersection points”.
There is a fascinating poem by the great Lebanese-born American-settled poet Kahlil Gibran called “On Children” that does an exemplary job of setting the parent – children perspective in the larger context of Life.
——
“Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
Which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
But seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children
As living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
And He bends you with His might
That His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
So He loves also the bow that is stable.”


