22 July 2026

Book Review: Inheritocracy by Eliza Filby

“It is time to talk about the Bank of Mum and Dad.”

This turned out to be one I did not enjoy as much as I had expected.

Which is surprising. I heard the author speak at an event in Rome earlier this year, and she was very impressive. The topic she touched upon, generation gaps, was enlightening. Her analysis and data went far beyond the general impressions and stereotypes I had of Baby Boomers, Gen X, Millennials, and so on.

Her main thesis was that family wealth is the real economic story of the twenty-first century. Younger generations are far more dependent on inheritance today than ever before. And she is not focused on inheritance as the one-time event toward the end of the benefactor’s life. She is talking about the much larger phenomenon of giving money, or even time, such as taking care of a young beneficiary’s children while the beneficiary is holding down two jobs throughout the life of the beneficiary.

She divides the benefactors primarily into Baby Boomers and, to a lesser extent, Gen Xers, with the beneficiaries being Millennials and Gen Zers. In the talk, she shared some jaw-dropping numbers and illustrations. For example, in the next ten years, in the US alone, $12 to $16 trillion of wealth will change hands through inheritance. With a “t” at the beginning! The following ten years will see somewhere around $100 trillion or more changing hands. This would be the largest transfer of wealth in human history.

She gave examples of how Baby Boomers generally had to take care of only one generation, their children. Every other generation has to take care of two, parents and children. She talked about how income growth has been fairly minimal over multiple decades, while the traditional wealth creation mechanisms, home ownership and education, have risen in price by leaps and bounds, putting them out of reach for later generations. Instead, they spend money on what has become much cheaper – e.g. traveling.

This is where getting financial support from parents early on opens up entirely new opportunities for those lucky children. This is not just about wealth creation. It is also about how much time people have at their disposal, whether they are holding down two jobs instead of socializing after one, their mental health, and even access to better healthcare.

In fact, because of this built-in separation in access to opportunities based on parental wealth, she declares meritocracy dead, or nearly so. Hence the title of the book.

All this was in the talk I heard.

I came home and ordered her book. Actually, I ordered three copies. I wanted both my kids to read it.

And the missteps started there. First, they charged me for three books but sent me only one. It came from the UK. Fortunately, I had ordered through Amazon, and they immediately refunded the price of the other two.

Not sure whether my expectations were simply too high, but reading the book was really a challenge. Maybe I learn differently and was expecting sharper analysis and more insightful observations. They were there, here and there. But there were so many personal stories, almost making this an autobiography, many of which felt trite and distracting, that I repeatedly lost the thread of the key points she was trying to make.

Her ideas were thoughtful and right on the mark. A couple of examples for each would have been enough. The book could easily have been one-fifth its length. It could have been a very powerful book with a handful of memorable messages. Instead, those messages became diluted by lengthy and often unnecessary personal anecdotes.

The editor and publisher could have done her a great favor by ensuring the themes flowed in a more structured and succinct way.

That said, the book does touch upon a few things her talk did not.

A couple of examples.

She talks about how Baby Boomers set the standards for entering youth, with optimism that hard work would be rewarded, but have struggled mightily to enter elderhood. They are now copying the younger generation. They are the largest segment of Facebook users, spend as much time as young people peering into their phones, and have seen the highest increase in alcohol overconsumption and sexually transmitted diseases. Sounds like somebody in their twenties, right?

She also brings out the unique perspective of what a Millennial woman like her has to go through. “The tyranny of time,” she calls it. Not the daily calendar, but the important milestones in life. Education, greater social freedom, and ambition have allowed Millennial women to pursue careers and other interests with unprecedented independence. But at the same time, they are constrained by milestones that cannot be moved very much. “Don’t marry early. Focus on your career… but don’t get left on the shelf.” “Don’t have kids early… but don’t wait until you are too old.” “Enjoy your twenties and travel… but prepare and invest for your future.” Opportunities have expanded, but biological and life milestones remain relatively inflexible, creating an infuriating struggle in the minds of many young women.

Again, great topic. Perhaps I should give it a second try someday.

Meanwhile, feel free to buy the book, or borrow it from me. But I would recommend listening to her on YouTube or finding one of her presentations first. She was kind enough to send me her slides after I connected with her on LinkedIn.

Category: Books | LEAVE A COMMENT
22 July 2026

Delayed by a Volcano, Rewarded with a Wine!

It was a cold winter evening 13 years ago when I showed up very late to a party at Rupak’s house. That itself was a change of plans, thanks to a perfectly timed text message from the host enticing me with a glass of red wine.

That evening, I met Rupak’s sister, Rupa and brother-in-law, Swarup. A bit of digging into his past later, I discovered that Swarup was indeed a dear friend of my own brother from their engineering college days. What were the chances of that?

Sharmila and I have been to Australia a few times over the years. We have visited Sydney, Brisbane, Adelaide, Cairns, Uluru, and even Hobart. But we have never made it to Melbourne, where Rupa and Swarup live, or Perth, where my childhood best friend Avijit and his wife Rakhi live.

This time, Melbourne was part of my plans. Things, of course, did not go smoothly, thanks to the volcano in Vanuatu.

But thanks to the extra effort put in by Swarup and Rupa, we did manage to get together. Coincidentally… over some red wine!

What a wonderful evening it turned out to be. If you had overheard our conversations, you would have been forgiven for thinking that we meet a couple of times every week. Such was the ease and familiarity of the discussions.

The topics, admittedly, were age appropriate. You know, body parts that hurt for no apparent reason, our children’s careers, retirement plans, financial investments, and all the other exciting things that advanced age has to offer.

This is what makes those insanely long-haul flights so worthwhile, after all.

22 July 2026

The same old Nats!

Nats and I first met in 1991 when we joined the same company on the very same day. Soon afterward, we discovered that the company had assigned us apartments literally next door to each other, along with a few other new recruits.

Lifelong friendships came out of that arrangement, but I was especially close to Nats.

That was largely because of his sense of humor. His timing, his choice of words, and his deadpan delivery have always been impeccable. He also had an insatiable appetite for books. I honestly do not remember ever seeing him without one in his hand.

I still remember one evening when the Harshad Mehta scandal had just broken. I was trying to explain just how enormous the amount of money involved really was to Srini.

I proudly explained to Srini that if we started throwing away one rupee every second from the day we were born, and did nothing else for our entire lives, we would have to live for about 140 years just to get rid of all that money.

Nats, who was closely listening, was suitably impressed by both my math and the absurdity of the number.

He paused for a second and asked, “Then, why throw away a rupee every second? We’ll pick up a rupee every second!”

I have no recollection of what we were discussing after that. I was laughing too hard.

Today was no different.

A full twenty-five years after I had last met him in Tokyo, he greeted me with exactly the same warmth and mischievous humor.

“Blood Indian of low origin, how are you?”

I burst out laughing right there in the hotel lobby. Instantly, a flood of long-forgotten memories came rushing back.

“So, what’s interesting in life?” I asked, as we settled down for breakfast.

“Nothing much. Still working. Trying to put food on the table,” he replied with a perfectly straight face.

“Only sambar and rice, though.”, came the quick rejoinder from him!

The breakfast that followed was spent catching up on his family in India and Australia, his life in Japan and now Australia, and everything in between. Every few minutes, another perfectly timed remark would leave me laughing all over again.

Too soon, it was time for him to head to the office and for me to pack and make my way to the airport.

Some friendships are built on shared experiences. Ours seems to be built equally on shared laughter.

I am really going to miss my friend. We understand each other in a way that is increasingly rare for me. I only wish we did not have to live on opposite sides of the world.

22 July 2026

The Kiwi way to fly

While checking the flight information display at Auckland Airport, something struck me as rather odd.

There are only two flight statuses: “Relax” and “Departed.”

That’s it.

No “Boarding.” No “Proceed to Gate.” No “Final Call.” I stood there for a while just to make sure it wasn’t a coincidence. Nope. Those really are the only two statuses.

It is such a wonderfully Kiwi approach to air travel. The airport seems to be constantly reassuring you, “Relax… we got this… no need to rush…”

And then, one fine moment, it calmly informs you that your flight has already left.

It’s basically:

“Don’t panic.” … “Don’t panic.” … “Don’t panic.”

“…Okay. Now panic.”

21 July 2026

My ride is here!

The plane to take me away has just landed and is slowly rolling toward the gate.

I will miss this Vanuatu. There is something wonderfully unhurried about life here, and I honestly do not know if I will ever get the chance to come back.

I would love to bring Sharmila here, but that volcano spewing incident has probably put a dent in her enthusiasm level!!

Ah well. Every journey has to end sometime. And if there is one thing I have learned over the years, it is that another adventure is always waiting just around the corner for me…

21 July 2026

Layover Lagoon

Hopefully, the airport reopens today. Thanks to all the rescheduling, I now have a fairly convoluted sequence of flights ahead of me.

In the meantime, there was little to do but make the best of an unexpected extra day in Vanuatu. I took a kayak out into Erakor Lagoon. The water was crystal clear. It was surreal to see all the starfish calmly scattered all across the sandy bottom.

20 July 2026

Here’s to Getting Stuck by a Volcano

I have been stranded on remote islands before thanks to bad weather and mechanical issues. This, however, is a first.

A volcano has upset my carefully laid-out plans.

The airport in Vanuatu was shut down because of increased volcanic activity. Ironically, just a couple of days ago I had tried to get to the nearby island of Tanna to see an active volcano. I could not make the trip because the volcano there had become a little too active.

Apparently, it had other plans for me.

The next six hours were spent trying to untangle travel arrangements. First, I had to convince Fiji Airways that my flight had, in fact, been canceled. One interesting observation from my travels is that FlightAware almost always seems to know about cancellations long before the airline call centers do. Second, you know you are in a remote island when the first option to a call center call is “Is this regarding a medical emergency?”

Then things got even more interesting.

The entire island lost cellular connectivity.

Shortly after that, the WiFi disappeared too. Rumor had it that someone had dug through the city’s fiber optic cable.

There are days when I think I should have been a travel agent. Just twenty-four hours earlier, my older daughter had been stranded in Cancun after her flight to New York was canceled. I managed to reroute her through Mexico City on a different airline with only a six-hour delay.

Turns out all your travel expertise goes out the window when your internet connection does.

My biggest worry was not even the flights. It was that my family back home would see complete radio silence from me and naturally conclude that I had been swallowed by a volcano.

Eventually, the WiFi sputtered back to life. I sent a quick message assuring everyone that I was still very much above ground and, as far as I could tell, not covered in lava. I also managed to sort out my flights.

I think.

Regardless, I found myself with an unexpected free evening.

The lady at the resort bar mentioned that a nearby village was putting on a traditional fire show. I settled my tab, grabbed my laptop backpack, picked up my umbrella because it had been raining, and hurried over.

What followed was absolutely magical.

The pictures cannot possibly do it justice.

I stood there completely mesmerized as the performers danced and played with fire with astonishing skill. Forget protective clothing. None of them were even wearing shoes.

It struck me that, had everything gone according to plan, I would have been sitting in an airport instead of witnessing something I will probably remember for the rest of my life.

Sometimes our greatest frustrations become the doorway to our greatest surprises.

We spend so much of our lives trying to make everything go according to schedule that we forget how generous the world can be when it interrupts us. Hidden behind canceled flights, broken internet connections, and carefully ruined itineraries are experiences we would never have planned for ourselves.

So here’s to getting stuck because of a volcano.

Every once in a while, life deserves to win the argument against our calendar.

19 July 2026

Standing room only!

In the evening, I went out for a stroll to the nearest village to soak in a little of the local life. The walk itself was fairly uneventful. But once I reached the village, I stumbled upon a delightful scene.

A volleyball game was in full swing, with all the seriousness of a village family affair. Men and women, boys and girls, had taken up positions on either side of the net. Nobody seemed overly concerned about the score. This was less about winning and more about an enjoyable evening together with a little exercise thrown in.

There were exactly three spectators. That gentleman in a black T-shirt, yours truly, and a remarkable dog.

The gentleman eventually wandered off. I took a few pictures and continued my walk.

The dog, however, stayed rooted to the spot, watching the match with complete concentration. He did not even bother sitting down!! Gotta be the most dedicated sports fan in the village!!