1 May 2021

Really?

So, Facebook has mined my posts and decided that I am probably getting married and going on a honeymoon!! I guess there is a reason we call it “artificial” intelligence.

And you know what Facebook wants me to do? Ask you to donate money to me so I can go on that aforementioned honeymoon!!

To be sure, in an act of over and beyond in helpfulness, Facebook also let me know that based on her prior behavior, my own wife might be a good candidate to ask for donation!!

You cannot make these stuff up!!

Category: Humor | LEAVE A COMMENT
15 April 2021

Happy New Year!

In case you are wondering why I am three and a half months late… well, today is the New Year’s Day in West Bengal (the state I come from in India). It is the year 1428 for us.

And if you are wondering why we celebrate three and a half months late… this might help…
(adapted from a post from seven years back)

>>>
Today is New Year’s Day for us – the Bengalis. If you were not aware, we, the Bengalis originate from a small state in the Eastern part of India intuitively called “West Bengal”.

You might be wondering why do we celebrate New Year’s in the middle of April. To understand that, you have to have a deep appreciation for who we are.

First, and foremost, we hate cold weather. “Thanda legey jaabey” (“Thou shalt catch a cold”) is the most commonly uttered full Bengali sentence. (I believe closely followed by “Ombol hoyechhe” – that is a story for another day). The mercury has to hover somewhere around 80 degrees Fahrenheit and we promptly adorn our heads with monkey caps (a prehistoric version of the ski mask). With a pompom on the top, to boot!

Most of January we are under our “lep toshok” (quilts) – and that one pair of socks we seem to have a love affair with. Way too deep to come out and even remotely consider celebrating New Year’s. Mid April, on the other hand is nice and toasty in the high 80s. Which, is the perfect weather to come out and celebrate. A “half sweater” (sleeveless vest) goes just about fine with that weather and celebrations.

Second, we are a little overwhelmed by the concept of New Year’s resolutions made on January 1st. Especially, since almost all such resolutions somehow need us to go to the gym. Gyms and us get along as well as the Kardashians and the concept of staying married. We simply don’t understand the unholy haste to sweat ourselves to death in the gym. We get enough practice in our crowded buses and trying to chase the crows away from the food on our balconies. We are doing just fine with our rice and “rosogollas”, thank you very much!

And third, we need our regular festivals and the associated one week “casual leave” from work every month. When it comes to actually working and the work hours, the French have nothing on us. We scoff at the concept that they waste their parliament’s valuable time passing laws limiting work to only 20 hours a week. On that front, we are very self reliant. We do that ourselves without needing any stupid laws to help us.

For every month we have our earmarked festival – New Year’s in January (Oh! the irony!!), “Saraswati Pujo” in February, “Dol” in March, “Pochise Boisakh” in May and so on and so forth. April is the only month we had nothing. And lo and behold!- we chose April for our New Year’s! And to be fair to the bordering months, we chose bang in the middle of the month of April to celebrate our New Year’s!

Plus it is always a great sport to debate over which saree or “kurta” to wear while our American brethren toil the midnight oil to file their taxes!!

There! You have it now!!

17 March 2021

Very funny!

This one comes from Avi (not sure where he got it). Usually you get a lot of these but I found this one too funny. Perhaps the image of the simian had something to do with it…

Category: Humor | LEAVE A COMMENT
21 February 2021

Sometimes it is funny because it is too close to the truth…

… like most Dilbert cartoons!!

Anyways, last night I was talking to a senior of mine from school who I have respected all my life not only for his superior level of intelligence but also his thoughtfulness and rational thinking and the ability to argue both sides of a debate..

(while discussing the opinion of the masses….)

“So, how do you explain the recent disbelief in science?”, I asked.
“That is not new. It has always been there.”
“Really?”
“Yes”
“Why do you say that?”
“If you can believe in God, you can believe in any conspiracy theory. And we have been believing in God for a very long time.”

I burst out laughing. And kept smiling the rest of the evening – not just because how he put it – but I realized that there was an element of truth to it!!

29 January 2021

That bit about “Early to bed…”

Nikita had asked me to wake her up at 7 am. Which is never an issue for me. It is a different matter that after about half a dozen nudging, she eventually gets up at 8:19AM. One full minute ahead of class starting at 8:20.

This morning though, I slept in and did not even get up till 7:15. I had barely put my glasses on and picked my phone up when I was accosted by these hilarious texts from Nikita. Apparently, she has been awake since 5 and realized I did not wake up at 6 (as I told her I do – which is normally what I do.)

But you can see her funny texts here accusing me of putting up a charade. She even went to the extent of opening up a website – http://exposingrajib.weebly.com to expose by double standards!!

BTW, I was checking the website – apparently, there are more exchanges on the website – I assume from Nikita’s friends?

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