6 December
2016
4 December
2016
Nikispeak: All’s fair in …..
Niki and I… this evening over dinner….
Niki: “I am so mad at our lunch teacher”
I was a little confused where all this was coming from. She just got up after sleeping in the evening and I was quite sure she was still groggy. But I played along…
Me: “I am sure you have a good reason”
Niki: “She confiscated my phone”
Me: “She confiscated your phone?”
Niki: “Yeah Yeah, she gave it back”.
Me: “What did you do?” (meaning what got her in trouble)
Niki: (interpreting I wanted to know how she got it back) “Oh! I pretended to cry.”
Me: “You pretended to cry?”
Niki: “Yes, I kept sniffling and walking around her so she will notice me and feel bad”.
Me: “But that is being manipulative”
Niki: “No. That is being smart”.
Me: “Really?”
Niki: “You had a better way of getting my phone back?”
I just walked away before she could see me desperately trying to hold my laughter back!!
In my defense, I was a goody two-shoe nerd is school and never got in trouble with my cell phone. Good thing, those days, none of us had cell phones either 🙂
26 November
2016
Another good one…
25 November
2016
I think she has figured me out quite well.
As many of you know, I enjoy going to a grocery store with roughly the same level of fervor as I enjoy having a hole in my head. I guess today was one of those “you gotta have a hole in your head” kind of day since Sharmila asked me to pick up something from an Indian grocery store which was close to where I was meeting a friend.
Now, let me tell you something. If there is one thing that confuses me more than a grocery store, it is an Indian grocery store. At least in a normal grocery store, I can wander around listlessly with not a clue where to find the stuff but nobody would be any the wiser since they are big stores and I usually do not run into anybody I know. In an Indian grocery store, somehow, there will always be somebody who will walk up to me and address me by my first name. Which, experience has taught me, is a strong indicator that I have met them before and ought to be addressing them back by their first names too. Except that, for the life of me, I would not remember where I had met them, what their names were and why do I even know them. In the bargain, I would also forget which aisles I had already visited and eliminated as possibilities and would have to start from square one (which is usually the lane left of the entrance door) again!
But I was impressed this time with the precision of Sharmila’s instructions. Absolutely no room for doubts or errors. As a result, most of those people who would have otherwise recognized me did not do so today since I was walking around like a zombie with my head down staring at the iPhone. I am fairly sure they thought I was some idiot playing Pokemon Go in the Indian grocery store.
On the upside though, that was an well executed shopping exercise for me. Kept following step by step and after I bounced off a couple of counters – muck like a snooker ball bouncing off the edges – I was quickly shot out of the store into the parking lot with a couple of fresh chicken tikka masala boxes in tow!
Like I said, I am very impressed with the precision of her instructions. I think she is about a few parentheses and a couple of well placed comments away from writing out some good computer code!!
24 November
2016
Nikispeak – it is all in the strategy
We were down to the final round of Jenga. Whoever won would have won the night. As you can see from the picture, the game started very aggressively by removing not one but two of the blocks from the lower most layer. Nikita was a nervous wreck after that. As you can also see I took out an outer block from third and fourth layer. It was a very very unstable structure at that point.
Nikita put up a fight for over fifteen minutes extremely gingerly moving blocks and the hands were visibly shaking….
Eventually when it fell down, she came back with a prompt excuse – “I am good at games which require mental strategy and not this shaky-hand strategy” 🙂
And before I could cry foul or suggest this is grapes being sour, she immediately added “I get the mental intelligence from your side, dad!”
I weighed my options. I came to the inevitable conclusion that anything I said at that point of time would only work against me.
So, I quietly packed up the pieces back in the box. I did get beat in the final game!!!
24 November
2016
Nikispeak – in full flow
Natasha is home from college for Thanksgiving. The mere sight of her elder sister around brings the fiesty side of Nikita out. The whole day has been filled with some hilarious comebacks and sarcasm laden comments. Moreover, when she gets in such a mood, she is an equal opportunity riposter. Anybody in the way is susceptible to getting zingers from her.
I overheard the tail end of one such conversations going on between the three ladies. I think Natasha was describing some college friend’s mom to Sharmila and talked about how funny she was. Touched to the quick, no doubt, Sharmila suggested “Hey! Your mom is funny too”.
Nikita, hitherto very quiet, piped up in a seemingly supporting fashion – “Mom, you can be funny”. And just when Sharmila was going to give Natasha that “See, I told you so” look, Nikita completed her sentence with a zinging “… but usually not on purpose” 🙂
18 November
2016
To all of you who did NOT wish me a happy anniversary from my last post….
Let me ask you something: If you were married on – oh! let’s say, April 1, 2000 (you noticed the irony too? 🙂 ) and somebody asked you “How long have you been married?”, would you say “sixteen years” or “sixteen years, seven months and eighteen days?”.
Yesterday, I posted a picture of my wife and myself sitting by the fire with the dog – who had his second birthday. I showed that picture to Sharmila – that would be my wife, if you were unsure – and suggested a cheesy caption.
Such captions would have been considered utterly romantic during our first few years of marriage. After twenty three years of marriage? Not so much. I got the thoroughly deserved laughter of scorn. And I duly reported that back to my blog/FB readers.
Since no good deed goes unpunished, I woke up this morning to a veritable deluge of Happy Anniversary wishes. Now that I have had a moment to catch a break from all those sincere “Thank you” notes, I am asking myself – and you – Where did I go wrong?
Should I have mentioned “after twenty three years three months and four days of marriage….”? (PLEASE STOP: that is not the exact count!! ). Would not that have meant that on twenty three years, three months and third day, she would have found that still to be romantic? But now that I am one day over, it is all scorn and derision?
Or do you think they thought there must be a very strong connection between our wedding date and our dog’s birthday (clearly separated by twenty one years)? You think they thought ours was a case of puppy love? 🙂
Let me also tell you what twenty three years, three months, yada yada has taught me – all those women who wished me happy anniversary – somehow they are going to comment on this post and prove that it was all my fault. Been there. Seen that.
Ah! well, at least, now I know that my wife is not the only one who gets our anniversary date wrong!!!
🙂
17 November
2016
I still think it was very funny…
This is reposted from a blog entry exactly four years back to this day…
We were in Costa Rica. Early morning. We were all up and getting ready for the day’s adventure… And this is what happened….
”
First Spanish lesson: Imagine this: Sharmila has all soaped up her face in front the bathroom sink, already running late for our volcano trip, quickly opens an eye a wee bit, locates the tap marked “C” and opens it in full blast to get a cold wash. In a few seconds, she lets out a scream!! A few commotion-filled minutes later, the two Texas born daughters – Natasha and Nikita – explained to her that “C” stands for “caliente” (hot) not “cold”. That would be the one marked “F”. Later, over laughs, I asked her if she learnt her first Spanish lesson. She promptly replied “Si” !! 🙂
”
#repostRiposte
14 November
2016
Note that this is filed under “Humor” and not “Cocktail” in my blog
That is because this drink has been inspired by a joke sent to me by my brother in law. Should I call it “BIL”evardier? Haha..
This is one part milk, two parts honey (Barenjager liqueur) and two parts vodka.
As the joke goes, the honey is to give you energy, the milk is to give you strength and the vodka is to give you ideas what to do with that energy and strength 🙂
Don’t tell me I did not warn you…
9 November
2016
