27 December 2018

Siri finally met her match!

That was one hilarious evening. With the cold weather outside, I was huddled with my parents inside the house. I was, in fact, showing them the pictures I had been taking the whole day on my phone. My dad has shown great interest in all the pictures the phone is able to take. Suddenly, I had this brainwave of messing up their brains by showing off Siri to them.

That is when the fun and chaos ensued!

I challenged my father to name some uncommon countries. Siri named the capitals with ease. Dad was super impressed. He had two immediate questions –

Koto daam etaar?” (How much does it cost? – yes, he is still the one wanting to make sure he is getting value for his money).
His second question was “Exam hall-e niye jetey debey?” (He was curious if kids can take the phone to the test centers).

Then I turned to my mom.
“Ask Siri a question”, I said.
Before she could come up with one, my dad interjected “Abaar manusher golaa-y uttor daiy” (He was letting my mom know that a human voice will answer her questions)

Not sure what was going on in my mom’s head, but the first thing she asked Siri was “How long will I live?”. I stopped Siri immediately and told my mom that she had to ask questions that are knowable. Nobody knows how long anybody will live.

He next attempt was “Rima ki korchhe ekhon?” (She asked Siri what my niece was doing at that moment).

I again stopped Siri. “Mom, ask some general knowledge questions”.
Theek aachhey. Haatir kota dnaat?” Again, I have no idea what goes on in mom’s head but her idea of asking Siri a general knowledge question was – “How many teeth does an elephant have?”

“26”, said Siri – much to the surprise and distrust of my mom.
Bhool bollo. hnaatir to duto dnaat”. My mom is under the impression that elephants have only two teeth.
“I think you are thinking of the tusks. Elephants have many more teeth in the mouth. How else can they chew those branches and leaves?”, I pointed out.

Thoroughly impressed, my mom went off with a retinue of animals..
“How about a horse?”. “40”, said Siri
“Lion?” “30”
“Tiger?” “30”
“Dog?” “42”
“Monkey”? “32”

Dhur dhur dhur. Eto jontu thaaktey manusher sesh kaaley bnador-er saathey dnater mil holo?”. Apparently, my dad did not take it well that humans chose to have the same number of teeth as the simians.

“Siri, what is my mother’s name?”, I asked
“Manju Rani Roy”, she said. Now, my mom was really pleased. As a background, my mom was born Manju Roy. After her marriage, my dad added that middle name of “Rani”. While she went by Manju Roy, most of her official documents carry her middle name.
“Hey! She got the “Rani” part too”, she exclaimed. (Of course, Siri just picked it up from my contact book – but my mom was never the wiser for it).

My dad suddenly piped up – “Gul maarchhey kina ki kore jaanbi?”. He asked how would we know if Siri was just making all this stuff up? I was going to say – Oh! We can cross check with Alexa but I thought the better of it.

My mom was beyond belief at the power of Siri. She told dad – “Dyakh – sob kichhu jane” (Look, she knows everything).

My dad disagreed with that. “Sob kichhu jaaney na”.
He continued to argue…

“Taholey to police-er sob subidha hoye jeto. Desk opor paa tuley jiggesh korteo – “Ke chor?” Aar omni ghaar dhorey chor ke jail-e purto”.

His point was if Siri knew everything, the police would have nothing to do. They would just sit in a chair with their feet up on their desk and ask Siri “Whodunit?” And consequently nail all the culprits without much of a fuss.

I had a hearty laughter!!

My mom’s final curiosity was if Siri could translate English to Bengali. Apparently, then she could talk to Natasha and Nikita fluently. Unfortunately, Siri could not.

My dad felt I should make something like Siri in Bengali (”erokom eta tui baaniye fyal. Dekhi himmot koto tor”)
I am on to it. I even have the name ready – “Bis-Siri” 🙂 (Bissiri is a Bengali slang for “terrible”)

16 December 2018

Guess who is glad to be back?

“On American soil”, as she put it. Except that there has been not much of American soil yet. Back in the air again for the last segment to Atlanta together. Can’t wait to see everybody’s reaction at the family reunion.

Especially Jay Jay! He will have that “Wait, Wait! How come nobody told me?” look around him and will be running up and down the living area to impress everybody.

15 December 2018

Sssssh!!! Don’t spill the beans!

The two Delta flights took off almost at the same time. DL421 was pulling out of its gate in Accra airport and slightly delayed DL2017 was already screaming down Runway 8R-26L in Atlanta airport. Two Roy family members were headed towards the same destination – JFK New York. Except Natasha had no idea.

I had been waiting for this day for five long months. I had been waiting for her to come back from Ghana safely. For a person who has only stereotypical knowledge of Africa, it was a hard thing to get used to when she declared that she would spend a semester in Ghana, Africa. However, there was a part that knew that she had to do what she needed to do and experience the real world out there all by herself.

The distance and lack of knowledge brought in a sense of helplessness too. This is not like New York that if she fell ill, we could jump on to a plane and be beside her. Just to get a visa to West African countries is a five week process that starts with yellow fever vaccination.

Still, we had thought that either Sharmila or I will visit her once during the semester. Well, unfortunately, days after Natasha left, we lost our father in law. Sharmila had to make two trips to India. And that put paid to any chance of going to visit Natasha.

There were no direct phone calls for five months. Internet was very spotty for her. Those frequently-interrupted voip calls were our only way of hearing her voice. The text messaging was the life line.

Thru the pictures she had sent us, we got to know a lot about Ghana. Their people, their food, their lifestyle, their value system and so much more. But the best part of everything – and the one I feel very proud about – is that Natasha, outside of her studies devoted a lot of her hours helping out orphans and developmentally challenged kids in Accra. In fact, she got herself associated with a school there and spent 2-3 days every week. Getting to see the pictures of the kids around her was incredibly satisfying.

Courses and subject knowledge can be taught over time. Compassion and empathy are difficult to teach.

So, here I am – sitting at a hotel bar next to the JFK airport. A few hours of sleep later, I will have to show up at the airport at 5 AM and see what her face looks like when she sees me!!

If everything goes smoothly and she can stay awake, I have a lot of questions for her about Ghana. On second thoughts, I think I will ask her to sleep in the plane after a 12-hour overnight flight already. I just want to sit next to her for some time after all these months.

23 November 2018

Intersections galore!!

“Kotha thekey beraatey esechhen?” I asked casually. (I enquired where they were visiting from).
“Philadelphia,” replied the gentleman, taken aback by somebody speaking Bengali in a free shuttle bus that carried us from the resort in Punta Cana, Dominican Republic to a nearby marketplace.

You see, Amitesh, Anusuya and I had run out of wine for the evening (I totally blame Anusuya for this 🙂 ) and needed to replenish the same. The daughters opted to stay by the pool and we three got on to the bus. As I got on, I heard the gentleman talking to his wife and two young sons in that unmistakable language that I grew up with in my early childhood.

Once the ice was broken, the seven of us chatted for quite some time. As you might have imagined by now, I was busy finding out intersection points. There were way too many. I think, it all started with me mentioning that both my daughters were born in the Dallas area. Quickly found out that Sumana (the wife of the aforementioned startled gentleman) was a relative of Debjani. To put this in perspective, Sharmila and I were very very close to Debjani and Subhasis (Subho) when we were in Dallas as our kids grew up together. In fact, we exchanged some great stories of Rishi (Gampu) – one of which involved his teacher asking Debjani if they had a pet duck! Story for another day!

Indrajit (by the method of elimination, you have no doubt figured out that he was the startled gentleman) and we were talking of Atlanta when he mentioned that they knew Rupa. That was too much of a coincidence.

“Do you also know them?”, he asked

“What do you mean know them? Of course, we know them. In fact they were the first Bengali family we were introduced to when we moved to Atlanta eleven years back. Rupa and I have another weird connection thru her husband Abhijeet and my wife Sharmila. Rupa’s father in law and my father in law grew up in the same small little village somewhere in Midnapore district in West Bengal. In fact, there was this time that both were visiting Atlanta and recognized each other !!!”.

Amitesh and Anusuya were also talking to them about Rupa when I got myself busy on my phone. Looked Rupa up quickly on my Facebook friend list and showed them the picture…

“You are talking about this lady, right?”
“Yes, she is wearing my saree,” Sumana responded.
“What? What do you mean she is wearing your spree??”, I asked, somewhat incredulous.

And that is when I learnt about Sumana’s booming saree business in all of US. An Indian saree merchant selling direct to Bengali women all over US? I knew I had hit the jackpot.

For the uninitiated, “Bengali woman” and “saree” are uttered like you utter “Marco” and “Polo” in that kids’ game. I was sure we were going to have a lot of intersection points and perhaps she might be the link that might get me to many of my unfinished searches!!

The conjecture was not false! In the next half an hour or so, we found out about a ton load of connections we had.

Bidisha in Dallas? Her customer!! Also, somehow I am related to her thru Sharmila. It is very convoluted but I think I am her grandfather or uncle or viceroy or something like that. Funny part – Bidisha and her husband Neil are excellent friends of Amitesh and Anusuya and that is how I got to know them to begin with!! To think, we were all standing in front of the same family that had been hosted at a party in Bidisha’s place just a few weeks back!

Sabori in Dallas? Same connection!

Satabdi from Maryland? Her customer!! Turns out Satabdi and I grew up together literally a few yards away from each other in the early 70s!

Indrani from New Jersey? Her customer again!! Funny part – I had to let her know that Satabdi and Indrani are actually sisters!!

“So, how do you know Shravani?”, I asked. By now, I was going thru Sumana’s Facebook friend list to see if there was any answer to many of my unfinished searches. “Don’t tell me – she is your customer!”

“Yes, how do you know her?”, she asked.

“Ummmm… let me reconstruct… yes… her husband Prasenjit was my wife’s classmate in Shibpur”.

I am fairly sure, she was thinking I waste too much time getting to know people with all sorts of weak connections.

Then there was the Narendrapur friend of mine…. and the list just kept growing!!

Finally, it was time for us to catch the return bus.

But not before I learnt an important lesson. My street Spanish has gone down considerably from those days of haggling with taxi drivers in the streets of Lima. You see, I had a simple request for the security guy outside the grocery store. Many Spanish words and wild gesticulations with my phone later, I made a breakthrough!

“Oh! You want me to take a photo”, the guy deadpanned in chaste English!

As we reached our destination, Indrajit and Sumana made me promise that they will get a chance to meet Sharmila some time.

“Only on one condition”, I insisted.

“And what could that be?”, they asked curiously.

“Just do not mention about your business to her,” I said looking squarely at Sumana!

22 November 2018

Thanksgiving – Roy Family Style

Usually, Thanksgiving in the Roy family means going abroad somewhere as a family. We do not have any kith or kin outside of India to speak of. And Sharmila’s birthday is usually a few days away (no more anniversary wishes please!!). That makes it a good excuse to bond together as a family as well as celebrate Sharmila’s birthday somewhere nice.

This Thanksgiving is a little different. We are spread all over the world spending time with an extended definition of family.

Sharmila is in India to spend some time with her mother (we lost my father in law a couple of months back).

Natasha is in Ghana spending time studying and looking after orphans in a school which has become her new family.

Jay Jay is with his friends in the USA.

Nikita and I are in the Dominican Republic spending time with each other and our closest family friends in Atlanta – the Mukherjees!

This year is a virtual Thanksgiving for us!!

Happy Thanksgiving to you all!!!

2 November 2018

Sharmila’s Art Show…

… or in other words, free wine for me.

I came straight from the airport and arrived earlier than her. It was funny hearing all the visitors talk about her and her paintings as I milled around incognito.

At one point I walked up to a couple staring at one of her works and asked “You like this painting?”. The old couple immediately touched the painting protectively and said “We have already bought this”. Like I was going to snatch it away from under their nose or something…

I just said “Oh” and shimmied on…