30 November 2015

No thank you! I am not going to post that.

This Thanksgiving, I have been somewhat overwhelmed by a lot of of FB friends posting a standard body of text that basically reminds all of us about the less fortunate among us. And as a measure of support, the posts want me to copy and paste the same post on my FB page for an hour.

I absolutely respect everybody’s right to express their opinions and emotions in their own way, provided it is not meant to harm anybody. And if cutting and pasting a standard body of text for an hour gives anybody a sense of standing in solidarity with the less fortunate, I say “Go for it”. Any thought counts.

However, if you could spare a second to think for a moment more, maybe there is a more effective way of turning your compassion into something that is a little more meaningful? Does seeing your cut and paste text really make any difference to the less fortunate ones? Assuming they are trolling your FB pages to catch the text within the hour that it is posted? Is that even the way they want to be recognized by others?

Again, if that is what gives anybody the sense  of accomplishment or compassion or expression of the same, then do it. Drop that “I will understand if I do not see your name” part, though. That is too patronizing.

It appears to me that there are more meaningful ways to show the same compassion. I am sure you know somebody less fortunate. Somebody whose parents passed away recently. Somebody who lost a child. Somebody who is having difficulty making ends meet. Somebody who is struggling with health issues…. Why not log off that FB and call one of them up? Talk to them for ten minutes. Visit them if you can. Find out how are they doing. Everybody has a story. Bring it out.

And then, if you wish, write on FB about the call and the story. Now that is a post I am going share and put on my FB page. Forget one hour. I am not ever bringing that post down.

29 November 2015

Sometimes Thanksgiving means this…

For years, Thanksgiving has meant taking the only real family I have within ten thousand miles – Sharmila and two daughters to a different country. Being in a foreign land, it has often brought the family closer together – thru as simple things as Tasha having a tummy upset in Peru  and the three of us trying with our best Spanish how to find a medication… to the four of us taking a collective breath as we saw the beauty of Arenal  volcano together in Costa Rica.  This year though, we did not plan any travel abroad to give Tasha flexibility of time to apply to colleges. As we got closer to Thanksgiving though, she realized she is ahead of the game – so we took them to Dallas. This is where they were born. Many years from now, they will owe whatever little success they will make of themselves to all those uncles and aunts that held their tender fingers as they figured out how to balance on their toes to walk.. and those friends that they crawled, walked, fought and made up together.

That being done, I am now catching up with Sharmila on our flight back home – with whom I have tried to get the kids (and ourselves) understand what true Thankfulness really means. Sometimes, it just comes down telling the air hostess to give us only one glass of red wine so that we can share… to keep with the sharing of the two ear buds of the one earphones enjoying the lilting song “Man Ahmade Am” by Gul Panrrah from Iran playing on my iPad. (In Farsi, that song means – “I have come to you”)

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31 October 2015

“Who are you going to believe – me or your own eyes”? (Groucho Marx)

“Nasha zaroori hai zingadi ke liye,
Par sharab hi nahi be khudi ke liye,
Kisi ki mast ankhon main dobo ja Saqi*,
Bara haseen samander hai khudkashi ke liye!”

Roughly translated… (improvements welcome)

“Getting intoxicated is surely necessary in life
But alcohol is not the only way to lose your self
Try drowning in somebody’s intoxicating eyes, my Saqi*
It is but the most beautiful ocean you can die in!!!”

*Saqi refers usually to your lady companion you are drinking with

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18 October 2015

Durga Puja – my style

Durga Pujo – the one time in the year, the Bengali diaspora in the world comes out in resplendent colors and simply gorgeous ethnic dresses and congregate around wherever the local festivities are being held. I suspect this is equally true for Bengalis in native Bengal but I have not seen a Pujo in Bengal for over half my life – so, I cannot speak from personal experience.

It is also, I suspect, the season for Facebook to upgrade their backend hard drives to deal with the sudden deluge of FB picture posts and profile updates of scintillating ladies and not-to-be-left-behind-in-their-looks husbands. At a very high level of pixel granularity too, thanks to the latest phones that I am yet to figure out how to make a quiet phone call from 🙂

But to me, this is also a great way to say “Hi” to a lot of old friends and families that I barely get to see during the year and make some new friends. I have to admit that with my terrible ability to remember names, the meeting of old friends and families often becomes embarrassing. However, I am the first one to admit that I am going to hit 50 in a few more months and therefore, I should be given a excuse 🙂

My most delightful moments in life is still with kids. Today, I was able to spend an hour with my runner friend Manas’s daughter. Frankly, I do not know (or rather do not remember) her name. And she had no ability to communicate with me – unless spitting at me is considered to be a form of communication. Some might actually concur 🙂

It is not the cherubic beauty of babies that gets me. It is their inability to understand TIME that mesmerizes me. Look at her. She has no comprehension of what is time. She does not know what five minutes back means. She has no idea of an hour from now means. She is absolutely in the NOW. There is no time for her than just NOW.

“That shiny thing on him? Interesting!! I am going to pull it.” She has no comprehension that it is the watch that someday will tell her time when she is supposed to have food – whether she is hungry or not. As of now, it is something to tug at.

“That black looking thing under my chin? I wonder how it tastes. Let me stick out my tongue to find it out.” She has no idea that a few minutes back she had already tasted my shirt and decided that it was not eminently edible. She has no ability to talk about “experiences”. Her mind is but a blank slate.

She is absolutely in the NOW.

For the folks who have a deeper understanding of spirituality (regardless of the religion you profess), would probably realize this to be the ultimate goal of meditation. Control your mind to live the only moment that is true – NOW.

Every time we fold our hands and close our eyes and bow our head to Ma Durga, that is what we are trying to do – focus our mind to be with the ONE.

And with that picture of a rather startled baby trying to understand why the uncle (and her dad) was disrupting her actions to get her to focus on some weird rectangular stuff her dad was holding … “Happy Durga Puja” to all of you.

 

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12 October 2015

Milestone reached for my blogsite

This morning my blogsite “History of my Future! (First Draft)!!” – (www.rajibroy.com) got a visitor from the 100th country! I had always thought that the hundredth country from where I will get a visitor would be some distant small country. Turns out it is almost next door to us – Honduras. Not sure what having readers from hundred different countries really means but figured hundred cannot be bad. What was that old saying about you cannot fool all the people all the time? 🙂

[BTW, there is only one friend I know of – Sharmistha Kolay – who can name the countries for all the hundred flags – and just about any other flag that is there in this world. I might be able to name about ten]

Readers by country

5 September 2015

In defense of minimalism…

“Jeb mein chillarewaalo –
Woh to baarish mein khule aam maaza loot-tey hain
Aur mutthi mein rupaiyawaalo –
Woh zindagi bhar panaha dhoondtey rahein”

Translated…

“Those who had only coins in their pockets
Went out and enjoyed themselves getting wet in the rains
And those with a lot of notes (bills) in their fists
Kept running for shelters all their lives”

This is a reflection on how people of little means often truly enjoy the free bounties of this beautiful earth and those with a lot of belongings spend all their lives protecting and sheltering them – mostly to realize that they cannot take their much protected wealth in their eventual journey.

6 April 2015

Incredible sight!!

I dropped Natasha, Nikita and Sharmila at Stanford for their campus visit. I had another hour and a half at hand. So, I headed to University Avenue in Palo Alto, parked the car and started walking. The idea was to sit down at Starbucks and observe all the people walking by or talking excitedly about their next new idea to start a startup.

It was then that I saw the sprawling Apple Store. Tempted by the possibility they might have some iWatches on display, I walked in. They did not. So, it was a pretty short stay inside the the store. But I saw something that made me feel really good about Apple.

As I started heading back to the door, I noticed a young lady wildly gesticulating (or what seemed like wild gesticulations) to a young man facing her. The young man had the unmistakable Apple employee blue shirt on. My first thought was an impatient or maybe even an irate Apple customer trying to explain something to him.

Except, as I came closer to them, I noticed he started doing the same. And none of them were speaking!!! In a flash it dawned on me that it was a customer who was bereft of the power of speech. And Apple actually had a sales agent handy who could converse with her through whatever hand language it is that people bereft of the power of speech speak with!!

I absolute froze in my steps. Clearly among the three of us, I was the one dumbfounded. Eventually, I came to my senses and proceeded to the door again. At the door, I did turn my neck around and perhaps, rather rudely, stared at the two for some time for a few moments. I recognize the rudeness of the act. But the moment was too powerful not to be taken in deeply.

It is one thing to make arrangements for people on wheelchairs. But to make arrangements for people who cannot talk at a retail store, that is something else. Not sure how many retail chains do this. If they do, hats off to them.

Today, I doffed my imaginary hat to Apple’s respect and sensitivity to differently abled human beings.

19 March 2015

Stop putting words in Einstein’s mouth!

One of the challenges of social media is that with the flick of a finger we can send to the world a link or a much-circulated post because one simply agreed with the message. One often gets so carried away that one does not stop to check the veracity of the words being forwarded. Sometimes one will even tag others even though those “others” are never mentioned in the post or in the picture 🙂

Einstein never said that he is “afraid of the day technology will surpass human beings”. Putting words in his mouth might seemingly add weight to the message, but that does not change the fact there is absolutely no evidence of he ever saying that. The most authentic source of Einstein’s words that we are aware of is a collection maintained by Princeton University Press.

The post going around that I refer to is the one where you see Einstein’s picture and that quote unquote “quote” 🙂 and then a picture of young kids on their phones.

So, that was the lie part.

Now the irony part.

You will notice that the youngsters never post posts that say “We are becoming dumb”. It is the parents, elder ones and allegedly wiser ones who feel that the next generation is becoming “dumber”. Or even their own generation that is taking to all these new fangled technologies with multi tasking etc etc. [It is a completely different point that they might be making their own point by forwarding posts that are patently untrue 🙂 ]

However, the concern and disdain that we might have towards technology and modern style of communication changing us (younger and older generations) is no less than what our parents had for us. You probably recollect how our parents never understood how we could listen to music AND do homework at the same time. (multitasking? what is multitasking? 🙂 )

Or what has happened for generations. Socrates and Plato were against written communication. They thought that this new technology will make future generations dumb because they would lose the faculty of memory.

Or when Samuel Morse (yes, he who invented the telegraph), as the lead in the Board of Western Union passed up on the opportunity to buy the patent to a new fangled things some guy called Alexander Graham Bell had invented because he thought future generations will become dumb if they used any communication without written record or proof.

So, let’s stop being cynical about newer tools and how new generations use them. Yes, there are side effects. None so dramatic as to make all future generations dumb. Human beings have their own way of adapting and adopting. This is how growth and progress looks from the inside. Over time, we learn to reject what does not work. No amount of Facebook post forwarding is going to influence that.

So, quit worrying. They will do fine. We will do fine.

Hang on now, as I research some links so that I can forward all of them to you with this post 🙂 🙂

[Disclaimer: If you are one of those that posted that Einstein thingy, don’t feel bad. There are too many of my friends that have done it for me to be able to single you out :-). Plus there is always the irony of critiquing FB posts thru a FB post 🙂 ]

18 March 2015

Early morning sun rays breaking thru the sky…

Taken during this morning’s run in midtown Atlanta. Reminds me of a great song by Amjad Sabri…

“Andhere Mein Dil Ke Chiragh-e-mohabbat
Yeh Kiss Ne Jalaya Savere Savere
Tasawwur Ke Suraj Ki Aik Aik Kiran Se
Naya Noor Paya Savere Savere
Lagan Jis Ke Dedar Ki Lag Rahi Thi
Qareeb Aur Aaya Savere Savere”

Roughly translated (with some assist from Qazi and Ritesh)…

“In the deep dark corners of my heart, who is this
Who lit the sparks of love, so early in the morning
This Sun of my own imagination – each and every ray of it
Has showered so much new light, so early in the morning
(She) who I have always persevered to feel near me
Suddenly has come very close to me, so early in the morning”

 

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