12 March 2022

Intersection points from cross connections

A few years back, Shamita had joined one of those social media groups that I was part of. Now, this group was for our elementary school where I studied from first grade to fourth grade. For some reason, I just could not remember Shamita. So, I called her up one day to see if I could jog some old memories. I started by asking her the various teachers’ names who would have taught her. The trouble was I could not relate to any of those names either. And I am pretty sure I remember each and every teacher’s name from the school.

Eventually we sorted it out. She never went to that school. Somebody had invited her to the group by mistake and after looking at some of the other girls’ names, she assumed this was her high school group. We had a good laugh.

She left the group. But of course, I became friends with her. Every birthday, I would chat with her and keep up with her family as they moved from Bhubaneswar back to Durgapur. She had read my blog and had let me know that her husband is equally quirky. Apparently, he too pursues new hobbies from time to time. She called it “keragiri”. We had agreed that I should meet her husband some time.

Which is what I did today. After catching up with all his “keragiri”s (right now, he is into cultivating orchid flowers), I asked Somnath (her husband) – “So, how did you guys meet each other?”

“Oh! it was a cross connection. Like the way you guys have become friends,” he said.
“What?”

So, after about 10 minutes of being totally bemused, this is what I was able to put together. This goes back to 1980. Some of you who lived in Durgapur those days might remember those black rotary phones at home. Life was simple enough that all phone numbers were of 4 digits. The numbers were easy to remember but the calls were difficult to make. There would be a lot of static, accidental three way connections and cross connections which would simply go to the wrong person.

It was during such a cross connection on an otherwise innocuous phone call that Somnath had placed, he found Shamita on the other side. They had no idea who the other person was. Shamita was barely in her 8th grade. Apparently, he liked her voice. And they got chatting. And Shamita gave him her number. (You cannot obviously rely on cross connections in aa deterministic fashion 🙂 )

And that is how their love affair started and continues to this day!!

Pretty crazy how mistaken identities / connections can lead to life time friendships. And more!!

11 March 2022

Learning something new this time!

You probably remember Tathagata from my last trip to India when he taught me about the blue gin turning into pink. I had to meet him and pick up something new. I asked him to make an Old Fashioned for me.

Whaat I found out is that he makes his own bitters. It is a fairly interesting process he follows. I also learnt from him a lot more about Angostura bitters. I did not know that it is manufactured in Trinidad and Tobago. (Later found out that it actually originated from Venezuela). I also found out from Wikipedia that there is only one person who knows the whole recipe of Angostura bitters (passed down from family member to family member)!

11 March 2022

That is one driven lady!

I had checked into the Westin in Kolkata where I was helped by Nisha – the Front Office Manager. As is my wont, I started talking about how she landed in this job and all that. I was fascinated by her life history. Particularly striking was the number of places she has worked in all over India – often taking risks uncommon for a lady of her age.

“Were you always driven like this?”
“Yes, sir!”
“Who was the biggest influence in your life for you to be like this?”
“My dad. He has always supported me in my decisions.”
“If I met him today and asked him to describe you in three words, what words would he use?”

After thinking for a few minutes, she said…
“Stubborn… empathetic and… free bird”

“How did you become a Front Office Manager?”
“That is what I studied for.”
“You always wanted to be a Front Office Manager?”
“Yes, sir!”
“Why?”
“I love interacting with people. Like you do. And that is the biggest part in the hospitality industry. Especially for Front Office Managers”.
“Got it. So, what do you want to be when you grow up?”
“I want to keep growing in my job, get promoted and experience more locations”

“Awesome! Maybe I will see you later in life in some other city or country!!”

By that time I needed to head out to Kalyani. While the occasion was a little sombre – anniversary of my dad’s demise, I could not help reflect on how driven and industrious the younger generations have become. And that is in fitness of things. “Old order changeth yielding place to new”. The New – as I am experiencing it – gives us confidence that the world is always being passed on to better and abler hands…

6 March 2022

“TKV”

Very few of us called him by his name Madhusudan. Most of us called him TKV and then towards the end, I think he had earned the nickname “King”. We studied Computer Science together in IIT-Madras (Chennai) and were a few doors apart in our hostel. I believe he was room number 247 and I was room number 239. That would make us about 8 doors apart.

My recollection of him includes how hardworking he was (he used to get up at the crack of dawn to go to the computer lab to work and block time for the rest of the day), how well he used to do academically and that two wheeler he had! I think it was a TVS Suzuki but I am not totally sure.

The last time I saw him was in 1989 when he left for the US. I had heard about his illustrious career in Sun, Microsoft and Facebook but got to meet him for the first time after 33 years this weekend in Atlanta. He and his family were in town for a wedding and Aluru and Suman took the initiative to put together a lunch meeting.

The credit goes to them for making this happen. I simply showed up. Pretty much like those Computer Science classes. This time, I brought the two wheeler though!!

11 February 2022

Ran into the good old Foremans!

Sharmila and I were enjoying our drinks in Alpharetta downtown when I thought I recognized a lady walking on the street. Walked up to her – and sure enough it was Traci and Chris! Traci and worked together in Equifax a decade back. And their daughter and Natasha went to school together too.

It was so great to see them after such a along time. Looks like they live close to Alpharetta downtown too. Hope to see them more often!!

30 January 2022

Rendezvous with a gentleman!

“You know I have dementia, right?”, asked John.
He had barely sat down in my car and put his seat belts on. And those were some of the first words he had for me.
I had no idea how to respond.

That morning, his wife Shelly and I had talked. She had mentioned about his increasing degeneration of cognitive abilities. We had agreed that I would come by and take him out for a coffee and snack.

I met him after many years. We were in Equifax together. That was two companies back for me. In between, I had showed up for his retirement party in Equifax. I remember we had gifted him with a bike. He is still crazy about bikes. That is when I had met Shelly for the first time.

Of course, I was not going to talk about his cognitive stuff with him. Having seen my dad and many of my hospice friends, most do not recognize that they are losing their cognitive capabilities.

You can imagine then why I was dumbfounded when he broached the topic right then and there – without any fear or favor. In hindsight, I had really nothing to be surprised by. John, as long as I have known him, has always been a straightforward person. He was and still is very open and honest.

Over coffee, I got to know a lot about his personal life and his past professional life. He was struggling here and there in his articulation but was clearly delighted that he could relive his past successes and happy moments thru the stories he kept telling me.

One of the highlights of his career was a small company that they had successfully sold to Experian (competitor of Equifax).

“So, you made a lot of money?”, I asked.
“I did alright”.

And then to prove that old mischievous John with a wicked sense of humor was still lurking around, he asked me:

“Do you know why I lost most of that money?”,
“Why?”, I asked, genuinely curious.
“Because I had married twice before I met Shelly!” he winked!

I almost snorted my tea out!!

I was good seeing you John! I look forward to many more coffee meetings!

20 January 2022

Dear old friend from 20 years back!

Geoff Dougall!!

So many idle chats we had had back in the late 90s and early 00s. Theoretically solving in our heads all the problems that the company we worked in was facing. Sometimes, Ted Dimbero used to join us and mostly leave us in splits with his inimitable humor.

I remember the Dougall family visiting us in our house in Coppell, TX. I think Geoff had a couple of kids and we had only Natasha. Then Geoff left the company and Dallas and joined his dad in the CPA firm he owned in Portland, OR.

I had to meet this gentleman this time when I was in Portland for a few hours. And what a gentleman he still is. It was a delightful couple of hours catching up on his family, his kids and how he has grown his business. Then there were those exchanging of notes on beautiful vacation spots and the discussions around politics in US and the geopolitical situation in the world.

Like good old times, theoretically, we solved a lot of problems. Instead of our company’s this time it was for the whole world!! Coming to think of it, if I were to solve any of world’s problems, I sure want this gentleman on my side!!

20 December 2021

What a great couple!

During this trip to India and the previous one, I have been generally avoiding meeting people like I normally do due to pandemic concerns. Exception of course being my immediate family and in a couple of rare cases a couple of very elderly folks since I am not sure if I will ever get a chance to see them again.

While in Durgapur, I received a request from a gentleman called Manojit to meet just for a few minutes. Not sure why, I agreed to do so. I had never met this gentleman before. We became Facebook friends sometime back when he had introduced himself as a batch mate of my brother. About three years back, I got a FB friend request from Parikshit who introduced himself as Manojit’s son.

Manojit showed up at the hotel with his wife Paramita. A 30 minutes meeting rolled into over an hour. The big reason was that we kept on finding newer and newer connections between us. Here are a few samples:

Manojit and my brother, as I mentioned, was taught by the same teacher. Manojit is also great friends with my brother-in-law’s best friend. Manojit and Paramita – who has lived in Muscat – are friends with Sharmila’s college classmate Tapas. In a weird connection, Tapas’s son interned in the company I work in in Chicago.

Manojit’s sister Swati, we realized, is an old classmate of my sister Tanusree. In fact, next day, when I told this story to her, she demanded that I immediately call back Manojit and get Swati’s number. Apparently, she and a few of her classmates had been trying to track Swati down for some time.

Paramita – wouldn’t you know – was in the same class as my sister-in-law during elementary school. I was impressed that my sister in law immediately recognized the face when I showed her the picture. Paramita Ray is also a friend of another Paromita (also a Roy) – Sharmila and my close friend in New York.

Paramita’s sister is a batch mate of mine. Different schools but with a lot of common close friends – like Mausumi – who I went to school with from first grade to fourth grade!

Proceeding further, my mother in law, as it turns out, was Paramita’s teacher in High School! As was my friend from Dallas – Pratyush’s mother!!

I can go on and on like this – but you get an idea how excited we all were as we found out yet another set of connections!

We agreed that our next meeting had to be in Doha when Sharmila and I fly to Kolkata next to completely unentangle all the connections we have!

Manojit and Paramita, it was great to see you! We should have met long time back!!! Also, Paramita, I found out from Chaitali that you are a great singer. We have to have a session some time soon!

17 December 2021

Ran into an old bartender friend

My brother and I had just checked in and then settled down at the restaurant in Westin Kolkata. The idea was to grab a quick lunch and then head out to explore all the places my mother had spent time in.

After we had placed our order, a young gentleman caught my eye. He was looking towards me. I had the feeling I must have met him before. From behind the mask, I could not recognize the face at all.

He stepped up – “How are you, sir? Everything okay?”

“Yes, yes!”, I said as I focused on his name tag. Tathagata. I feverishly ran thru in my mind the dozen or so staff members’ names that I knew in the Westin but could not still place him. The name rang familiar but I could not see the face.

I think he sensed my struggle. “I was at the JW Marriott, sir!!”

Immediately, the memories came back to me!! Of course! This is Tathagata – the bartender at the lobby level bar in JW. He diligently fixed me with a Hendricks and tonic followed by a glass of wine every evening in March when I stayed there with my siblings and their families for a few days.

“What are you doing here?”

I learnt that he had moved to Chennai (the Sheraton, I think) and then had to move back to Kolkata since his mom fell ill.

I promised to see him in the evening at his bar.

He fixed me with one of his signature cocktails. And I picked up some wisdom around “blue peas” and how to make a gin change its colors with it (and again with the tonic water). I have to try this at home.

It was good to see Tathagata after almost nine months and learn aa few things about his trade.