I had finished my second Board meeting in as many days and as many cities and had successfully survived thru them without talking. The second one was in Crawford Hotel in Denver which is in the same building as the Union Station. Decided to take the train to the airport instead of Uber.

It is a lovely building replete with train themed bar, coffeehouse, book store with an aura of a great throwback to the yesteryears.

First, I had to solve a practical problem. Where is my train and how do I get myself a ticket? I was looking here and there when a lady – who looked to be part of the staff given the fluorescent jacket she was wearing – approached me. She asked me if I needed help.

I used gestures to let her know that I cannot talk and that I was looking for a train to the airport. (you should have seen how smooth that take off was with my right arm). She immediately got it. She took me to the platform and pointed to a train there.

“It will leave in a minute”, she said.

I gestured that I need a ticket. She immediately fished out her iPhone and showed me the app. As I was buying it, she kept telling – “You can do this in the train”. I stopped and wrote to her in my iPhone app – “That’s okay. I want to walk around the station and enjoy it. I will take the next one.”

She seemed to be overjoyed. Took me around and gave me a full tour of the station. Apparently she has been working there for nearly 10 years.

Eventually, I said Thank You and Bye (used ASL and lip movement) and went to the coffee shop. There the tall girl at the counter welcomed me in a very friendly manner and asked what I would like. I first flashed my “Temporarily speech impaired” card and then flashed “One 12 oz cappuccino, non fat milk, please”.

“You can hear right? I can talk?” She asked.

I wrote back – “Of course! You will be surprised how most people do not get it. In fact you are the first person to get it”.

Well, with all that intelligence, she eventually disappointed me with her words.

“We have no non fat milk!!”

Anyways, I got my changed order in. Now, I have to mention one thing here. I have become fairly adept at saying “Thank you”, “Good morning”, “Hello” and all that in ASL. For example, I invariably use ASL to say Thank you or Thanks a lot!

I signaled Thank you to the girl and stood in a corner for my coffee.

Then something funny happened.

I noticed she went and talked to the much tattooed barista. This, I have seen at every bar and restaurant. Once I let one person know that I cannot speak, they alert every staff around.

The barista, surprisingly, stopped making my coffee and came out towards me.

I figured he had some questions about the cappuccino and instead of yelling from there, wanted to chat standing next to me. (I had to flash my phone, remember?)

Well, instead, he caught me by surprise when he started making all sorts of hand movements directed at me.

It took me a second to realize what was happening. HE was talking to me in ASL. (Well, advanced ASL, if you ask me)

It, in fact, brought back some memories of what happens whenever I go to a Central American or South American country.

I will start a conversation with a stranger with a few words and phrases in Spanish that I know. And then all hell will break loose once the stranger continues with a lot more sentences of Spanish.

Similar to that, in this case too, I quickly retreated to my “No habla espanol” mode!!

The barista smiled knowingly and went back to making coffee!!

One thing I have realized… people can be very empathetic once they realize you are impaired of something. However, that empathy does not necessarily translate to simple math in their heads.

#1
I got into the Skyclub in Atlanta airport. Dutifully smiled at the lady and flashed by boarding card on the reader. The light turned green and I was walking away. Except, the lady came running behind – “Mr. Roy. Thank you for being 360 member. Thank you for your loyalty….” I guess the screen had flashed up all my details when I scanned the boarding pass. She clearly wanted to say a lot more when I flashed my iPhone saying “Temporarily speech impaired. How are you?”. She immediately lowered her voice to a hushed tone and led me to a nice chair.

And I was like… I can hear you ma’m. You can talk to me normally. In reality, I just did the universal Thank You sign from ASL to her and sat down.

#2
There was a burly looking gentleman who clearly was not pleased with something in the world sitting next to me in the flight. He was having a rough conversation with whoever it was on the other side of the phone. Eventually, he got done. He was staring at the bottle of water sitting between us. I immediately signaled to him that it was his – I had already taken mine. And for good measure flashed my sign – “Temporarily speech impaired. If I am not responding immediately, I am not trying to be rude.” His demeanor changed immediately. Could not be any nicer to me. If the flight attendant asked me if I wanted snacks, he would helpfully re-ask me if I wanted snacks. Best part? After we landed, he got up promptly and got my suitcase down from the overhead bins.

And I was like… I can’t speak. But I do not use my throat to get my suitcase down. It is not like I bark orders at my suitcase to come down.

#3
Just finished dinner at the restaurant hotel. As always, I sat in the bar reading a book. I had flashed my usual iPhone sign to the girl who came to take my order. She read it and became extra friendly. A few minutes later, another girl came and asked me if everything was okay. I nodded and then flashed my sign. She immediately told me – “No problem. She already told me!”. Between those two, they must have come by some 10 times to check in on me. Finally, when I asked for the check the first girl came and gave me a paper with something she had written out. It asked if I was staying in the hotel and if I wanted to put the bill on my room. Then she had drawn two check boxes – one said “Yes” and other said “No”.

And I was like… What are you doing? You can ask me that question and I can nod my head and write down the room number on the bill for you.

Very amusing incidents. But all stemming from people’s first reaction to be helpful to me. I will take that any day.

So I have done coffee shops, bars and restaurants without talking in the last 5 days. Now, we go for a couple of notches higher…

1. Number of flights: 3
2. Number of hotels: 3
3. Number of Uber rides: 4
4. Number of cities to visit: 2
5. Number of Board meetings: 2
6. Number of words I am allowed to utter: big fat ZERO!