18 May 2015

We pulled it off!!!

The much anticipated evening went off without a snag. In reality, by the dint of the fact that the meeting lasted for four hours (originally I had planned for two), one might even conclude that it was a smashing success. To understand the backdrop of this meeting, read here.

To put all the emotions and enthusiasm – of the first time three folks who crossed each others’ path (but never together) more than three decades back actually sitting down together under the same roof – in a few paragraphs is gong to be way beyond me. I can give you an idea how it started. As Piyali, Jayita, Rajaram (Jayita’s husband) and myself got together, my pleasantries included “Rajaram, you look different”. Rajaram, the soft spoken guy he is, demurred that nothing really has changed in the last three years. Not willing to give up, I suggested, “Maybe you did not have a mustache before?”. Our doubts were settled finally (in my favor, I might add) once I went to my blog and fished out a picture of him from three years back!! And that is when we all settled down for a nice bottle of wine!!

Of course, I had met Piyali a few minutes before and my first reaction was “Where is the rest of you?” 🙂 She has dropped an unbelievable amount of weight. We got a few minutes to discuss her multiple attempts to drop weight over the years and finally how the kettle ball exercise clicked for her. We also talked about running and how to get started in a gentle way into long runs…

It was magical catching up on each others’ families, the old friends we had crossed paths with in the past and our experiences of living in three different countries. The evening was worth just remembering some of those souls from our past (and adding to my “must visit sometime” list). The gravy was catching up on our families and personal lives.

Of course, intently listening into the girls’ conversation as they talked about their old crushes (while I completely feigned I had no idea who they were talking about) is something I am hoping to leverage to the hilt some day. Okay, maybe I have deleveraged already since Rajaram (Jayita’s husband) and I laughed about it later anyways!!!

Before I knew it, my ride to the airport was ready!!!

I am not sure I can put the three of us together ever again. But I sure hope that will not stop us from getting together in pairs…

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18 May 2015

Three way intersection point!!

This is the story of how the three of us who grew up within a couple of miles from each other and got separated by thousands and thousands of miles across continents as we continued growing up finally might come together under the same roof for a couple of hours!!

For the first part, you might have to go back to the story I had published in June 2012, where I had tracked down Jayita from my fourth grade days finally in Dubai. Sharmila and the kids got a chance to meet Jayita’s family. You can read about it here.

For the second part, there is an interesting twist. I was introduced to Piyali circa 1986 by Madhumolli in Kolkata. While Piyali and I grew up in the same small place, we never had met before. That same Piyali has become a very famous doctor now in Kolkata. Fortunately for me, thru all her successes and fame, she has chosen to remember me.

A few weeks back, I made my annual call to her to wish her a very happy birthday!! I also paid her a compliment on losing some significant weight – from what I could figure out in Facebook pictures. She explained how she has focused on diet control. I took the chance to ask her to start some exercise like brisk walking or running. I assured her that running is not as scary as it sounds.

“I will tell you what. I will be coming to check on my dad in three weeks’ time. I will come by your house one early morning and we will go for a run”… that is exactly how our call ended.

This Friday, I called her up in Kolkata to set some date to go for a run. She informed me that she would be in Dubai that time. For a moment I was amazed how far she would run away just to avoid me 🙂 But I also remembered that she had a practice in Dubai too and went there very regularly.

“Okay, we will run in Dubai, then”, I said to her utter shock. You see, she did not know that I was routed thru Dubai to go to India and I had a long – and I mean a very long – fourteen hours to be precise – layover. I could easily come out, put in a run and then go back and take a shower in the airport. She could not believe for a moment how far I would chase her just to make her run 🙂 Eventually, I explained the whole situation.

That is when I remembered something.
“Hey, do you know Jayita?”
“Which Jayita”
“Mukherjee. From Durgapur”
She thought for a while and said “Yes”. And described her.
“How do you know her?”
“We went to Carmel school together”.
That was confusing to me. I knew Jayita never went to Carmel school but Piyali’s description was fairly accurate. Regardless, I said “Okay. How about this? We will skip running this time. But how about the three of us get together in Dubai?”
“What? How? Where is she?”, she asked!
“Jayita lives in Dubai!!”
That was that!!!

Immediately called up Jayita half expecting her not to know Piyali.
“Hey, did you ever study in Carmel School?”
“No”, said Jayita, as I had expected.
“Do you know Piyali?”
“Which Piyali”?
“Mukherjee”
“Doctor?”
“Yes”
“I think I do”
“How can you possibly know her? You and I went to Benachity Junior High School – I know she did not study there. She went to Carmel – I know you did not go there. Did you meet her in a different context”.
Jayita thought for a few seconds and said “You know Rajib, I think we studied eleventh and twelfth class in Bidhan school”
That made a world of sense to me. Finally!!
“How about the three of us grab a drink in Dubai on Monday evening?”
“What do you mean? Where are you? Where is she?”.
Of course, I explained the whole story to her…

And here I am … half way thru to Dubai from Dallas … 37,000 feet above northern Europe… wondering how it would feel to have three friends who were connected to each other but never overlapped – started their life journeys in the same place but now are in three corners of the world… finally get together under the same roof for the very first time…

I am hoping against hopes the plan does not hit a snag. And also that Rajaram (Jayita’s husband) will join us. We need a good photographer to capture the moments. I do not believe I will get another chance to put the three of us together again!!

17 May 2015

Wing to wing

What you see in this picture is the long wing of the A380 I am sitting in. Thru my window, you can see on the other side of the wing is a Quantas flight – also a A380 with its humongous wings. Each of the wings is longer than the entire length of the flight the Wright brothers took for the first time!!!

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17 May 2015

Here we go again!!

The long quarterly pilgrimage to check on my parents begins now. As I await the Emirates flight from Dallas to Dubai, I am little worried this time. It was not supposed to be this way. My dad’s health had rebounded enough that about two months back, he wanted to go to Puri (an ocean resort with a lot of venerable temples in India). I had booked a nice resort and flight tickets for my parents and my sister’s family as well as my brother’s family. All was set for this trip to India to be spent in the resort with my family. I was not going to go to my parents’ house at all!!

Two weeks back, his kidneys failed and now looks like he has lost 90% of both the kidneys. Forget the trip – he is back to being bedridden again. So, the first worry is to see what condition I am going to see him in. I am hoping he will be slightly better – at least get up on his bed and talk. The challenge is he refuses to undergo dialysis. Let’s see if I can convince him.

But another big worry is how to deal with the nephews and niece. For many of them (and a few adults in the family), this would have been the first time ever they would have flown in a plane. The kids were so excited that they had spread it all over their school among their friends (most of whom have not flown yet either). They are devastated now.

I have to figure out how to make it up to them somehow. 

Finally, there is always the goal of creating intersection points and meeting old friends/acquaintances from my long past and make new friends on the road. A lot depends on my dad’s health though…

And they just called us for boarding… so off we go…. 

17 May 2015

Well, duh!!!

Apparently, Microsoft just released a study that has shown that technology is shortening our attention span. You can read it here

This, of course, was published by Microsoft’s Department of Stating the Obvious. In the department’s defense, they said they would have come out with the research results a few years back but they kept getting distracted while checking their Facebook, Instagram and Twitter accounts 🙂 I am also guessing nobody in that department has a teenager kid 🙂

16 May 2015

Have we really strayed this far?

On my flight to Dallas, I opened up the USA Today online and went to the Tech section to see what might be interesting. There was an interesting article about “8 things you are still doing wrong with your email”. http://www.usatoday.com/story/tech/columnist/saltzman/2015/05/16/email-mistakes/27243937/

Here are a couple of suggestions from the author:
1. Set your email system to send mails to your boss very late at night so that (s)he thinks you are burning the midnight oil. Smilarly set times of delivery of your emails so that everybody thinks you are working when you are really on the beach.

2. If you are late on delivery, change the time on your computer, send the email (it will carry the wrong date stamp) so your boss would think you did it on time – there were some server issues only.

Good God! Have values like general ethics and integrity completely escaped from Corporate America?

I have half a mind of sending that article to all my employees with one rejoinder: nobody cares about the hours – only what you get done and if you are slipping, talk to your team and manager and ask for help – ask them to have your back – they will respond. Whatever you do, don’t start cheating. You will be amazed how those small ones quickly snowball into big ones.

15 May 2015

That was a unique Happy Birthday call ! To my mom! No less!!

Like every morning, when I got into my car heading to a meeting, I started making my birthday calls. Usually I finish off Asia and Europe in the morning and the Americas in the evening or during lunch time.

First, I called up home in India. My dad picked up. After talking to him for a few minutes I asked “Is it not mom’s birthday today?”. He was totally flummoxed. “Tor maa-er jonmodin aaj?”. (‘It is your mom’s birthday today?’).

Now, my friends from India can relate to this. There was no real system of birthday records when my parents were born (or for that matter when I was born). Most people would get an official certificate later in their lives (especially when they needed a job 🙂 ) with a convenient birthday for themselves! The concept of celebrating birthdays – at least for my parents – is totally foreign. Last time I had gone home, I had noted down their “official birthday” from their ID cards.

Which is what led to the call today. To get back to my story, when I confirmed that it is indeed my mom’s birthday today, his next question was “Mrityudin eto kaachhe choley esechhe, ekhon jonmodin niye ki hobey”? (‘Now that we are so close to the day we will die, what is the big idea celebrating our birthdays?’). Exasperated, I asked him where mom was.

Next, I called up my sister downstairs – for that is where mom evidently was. Once she gave the phone to my mom, I asked “Aaj tomar jonmodin to?” (‘Today is your birthday, right?’). You could sense the utter confusion in her mind. I could hear her asking my sister “Aajkey amar jonmodin?” (‘Today is my birthday?)’. Of course, my sister’s reaction was – how the heck was she supposed to know? In her defense, she was nowhere near when my mom was born 🙂

With little regard to thanking me for wishing her, my mom’s first reaction was “Aaj ki bishey Josthhi?”. She switched to the Bengali calendar (which is completely different from the Gregorian calendar). Of course, it was my turn to go – how the heck am I supposed to know that? After I pointed out that I got her birthday from her ID card, my mom told me that is her “official birthday”.

“Okay, so what is your real birthday?”, I asked (in Bengali of course). “Bishey Josthhi”, she continued to insist. “I got that part. Which Bengali year?”. More confusion ensued. After a couple of minutes of mutterings, what I could reconstruct is that she was born two years after her elder sister was. And her elder sister was born the year there was a big flood in Kalna!! Go figure!!! At this point, I had no idea whether I was making forward progress or regressing.

Internet had nothing on floods in Kalna during the 40s. Fortunately, there is a site that will change Bengali date to the English calendar. I tried five years on either side of her “official birthday” with that “Bishey Josthhi”. I had one other data point. My grandfather had once told me which day of the week my mom was born in – because it matched the day of the week I was born in and he had told me people that are born on that day of the week have to work very hard in their lives. That datapoint narrowed it down to exactly one year. I had cracked it!!

Of course, I called my mom again. “Which day of the week were you born in?”. I enquired to double check. “Saturday”, she confirmed something I was already aware of. “Well, then hear me out now. Your real birthday is Jun 3rd, 1944”. Do not forget that.

She gave it some consideration and said “Ok. But let’s celebrate May 15 since that is the official date”. And I was like “You are telling that now??????? Could you not have just thanked me when I wished you earlier??????” 🙂

My mom. I tell you. 🙂 🙂