… Watching a dad help his physically challenged kid out of the car.

I was to pick up Natasha from the horse farm at 1 PM. I reached there a few minutes early and parked the car on the ground along with a few other cars and a horse trailer. And then waited in the car with the engine and air condition on. Presently, a small blue car pulled up and a gentleman got out. He went straight inside the barn. I assumed he was there to pick up his son or daughter too.

A few minutes later he came out of the barn. He was by himself. I figured the kids were going to be a little late (they have to untack the horses and all that). I shut down the engine and stepped out of the car to chat up the gentleman. He, instead, greeted me and went straight back to his car. I noticed then that his car was running too. Maybe, he was going back?

He went to the driver’s side alright, switched off the car and came around to the passenger side rear seat and opened the door. It was then that I noticed a small kid in the rear seat – he was probably no more than 7 years old; he was struggling to get out by grabbing the seat in front. His dad was softly speaking with him all the time. Eventually, his dad stuck his head in and grabbed his arms around him and gently pulled him out. He held on to him as he took him to the barn. And I noticed that the kid had an artificial leg.

I stood there mortified by my car. So many emotions were flying thru my mind. I am a dad. Instinctively I put myself in that gentleman’s shoes. And suddenly I remembered why Natasha started coming to this barn to begin with. I had never asked her all the details.

So, on our drive back, I told her what I saw and asked her if she could tell me the details of what happens inside and what she does. This summer, she volunteered in this barn that does, what, she explained to me, is called hippotherapy. I understand physically challenged, mentally challenged (and from Wikipedia I found out later even speech challenged) undergo a therapy where the horse riding and horse movements are used to train the motor skills. Natasha explained how the horse riding focuses the mind because of multiple things to take care of at the same time and that is used as a gentle mental exercise.

As we pulled in the garage and she left the car, I sat back in the car to think thru what I had just learnt. My mind drifted into deep thoughts back to the kid and how blessed he was that inspite of a tough deal from life, he is blessed with parents that are there to literally walk with him every step. I also thought about the lady who ran that farm. She, of course, does not do this for charity. But I hope she makes a lot of money. If there was ever a noble cause to pursue and make money, this certainly had to be it.

I also felt extremely privileged that Natasha taught me about hippotherapy but more importantly that she had chosen to channel her love of horses and her summer time to such a great cause. Next week, I might actually stay back after dropping her to see a great cause in action.

First time in my life I read a full Supreme Court judgement. In its entirety! All 95 pages!! Twice!!

There were enough emotions being poured out in Facebook among my friends about the recent Supreme Court and the Hobby Lobby case (ACA, access to contraception by women etc) – mostly against the Supreme Court decision – and a lot of them by women – that I had to ask myself – “What kind of insensitive men are running our Court these days?”. Just to get a first hand impression, I downloaded the whole judgment and started reading up in the long coast to coast flight.

First, I read Justice Alito’s writeup of Opinion of the Court (making a case for the final decision of the Court). Impressive arguments. It made total sense to me. Followed up with Justice Kennedy’s Concurrence.

I was not sure there was a case against. So, then read up Justice Ginsburg’s writeup “Dissent”. Splendid arguments. Great alternate ways to look at the same situation. That made total sense to me too. Justice Breyer and Justice Kagan’s Dissents were one paragraph only – mostly concurring with Justice Ginsburg.

So, I was even more confused then. I asked myself “Which way would I vote”? Not knowing anything better, I went ahead and read up the whole 95 pages again.

And this is the conclusion I came to… I am really really glad that some really really smart people investigate these really really intricate and controversial questions in so many different ways and then lay down the rule of the land. I am certainly not up to it. That, above all, was the most comforting feeling I had.

And the decorum they have of laying down their bitter opposition while simultaneously showing great respect to folks with opposite points of view is something I can always learn from.

BTW, some of the facts I learnt while reading – that I never learnt from any of the FB posts:

1. The case was not about all contraceptives. In fact, ACA, does not even cover the more effective forms of contraceptives. Only the 20 specified ones by FDA. Of them, 16 was never in question – they all prevented fertilization of eggs. The debated and contested ones were 4 of them – that prevented a fertilized egg to continue growing by attaching itself to the uterus. (I think certain religious beliefs believe life starts when the egg gets fertilized).

2. The case was not about whether women can have access to those 4. It was about if certain kind of for-profit organizations could be forced to pay for them when their religious beliefs is that it is a sin to do so. In case of religious non-profits, the law today already requires that the insurance carrier will have to pay for those 4 drugs without asking the non-profit or the employee to pay. And no insurance carrier has ever objected because the costs of going thru with an unwanted pregnancy is apparently much higher than the cost of those 4 drugs.

Both sides agree to the above.

In any case, I am not sure I will ever use any of these information. But sure taught me that I should get to the facts before I evaluate…

There is a very interesting – and that is the most generous adjective I could come up with – analysis of why soccer is not popular here in US. Apparently, the problem is there are too many “draws”. And the solution suggested is to have judges giving points for every 15 minutes of play.

I have not followed soccer in a long time and am an avid NFL and College Football guy now. With that, let me say the following:

1. Soccer in the rest of the world is doing fine, thank you. They do not need any boost from us in terms of popularity.

2. I thought we used to complain about East Bloc judges and the whole system how gymnastics point system worked in the Olympics. I thought we do not believe the ref on the (American) football field and want to rely on the objective way of replay technologies. Why this change of heart and reliance on three judges?

3. The funniest part? TIME calls the world soccer body “insular” to changes of rules. Of course, we, who are throwing stones at other glass houses are the same ones that cannot put in my simple drug testing rules in our national sport or summarily dismiss who use epithets on people who unfortunately were born with the “wrong” skin color.

4. At some point of time, we have to understand that here, in this country, it is all about money. Nothing wrong about it. Money drives glamor and popularity and that drives what kids want to do. Btw, the recent rise of cricket’s popularity and India’s seizing the center stage from the traditional owners – England, is a great study of how money drives popularity.

5. So, who in this country drives that money? It is not the spectators. It is the advertisers!!!

6. And there is a lot of advertising in a (American) football game. A football is “live” for about 12 minutes in a game that lasts for 3 hours. Imagine the ad time on TV or in the stadium. Look at the time between pitches in baseball. And the interruptions in baseball.

7. I am rusted, but as I recollect, soccer is a lot more continuous and free flowing game. The ball is “live” for almost all the 90 minutes. (Other than half time). That is a nightmare scenario for me as a TV advertiser.

8. Till we have figured out how to stop the soccer game every time somebody has received a ball, I do not see much money in the game.

We are good at what we do but let’s leave them alone and let them play their own game. Sucks that it happens to be world’s most popular sport. But what do we care? If we can get one team from Canada to participate in our game, we can call our series the “World Series”. We do not need the rest of the world to call it World Cup. And frankly speaking, they do not need our help. They are doing fine.

Now let me get back to my off season trade analysis for the Falcons 🙂

I had always dreamt that when I become a full fledged CEO, my first big executive decision would be unraveling a world beating strategy or my best in class management team in front of a large gathering. You know, like I see other big successful CEOs do. So I had promised to myself that I will take 30 days before I make my first executive decision. It had to be a totally world beating decision.

Well, that promise came about 26 days short 🙁 I walked into a large office center this morning and realized that in full due mid-western respect to the CEO position, they had kept the rockstar parking spot next to the entrance door for me with my name and position advertised on it. I squirmed in my pants and parked my rental car in the proper parking lot a few yards away with everybody else.

For two hours, I went thru presentations and was completely distracted by what had happened. Finally, I had to own up to who I am, excused myself for a bio break and made a beeline for the front lady desk and sheepishly asked her if she could ensure that never ever would there be a parking lot or a office with my name on it. She was the sweetest lady. This is the Midwest. It was quirky but she immediately obliged.

There! That was my first executive decision that I put my foot down firmly on and was willing to pull rank on to get done. Total anticlimax, but I so feel like being myself again! Phew!!

Every long caravan of cars on single lane roads is invariably led by a driver over 80 years old driving at half the speed limit.

And “pull over area for slower traffic” signs were invented AFTER they got their driver’s license!!

A few weeks back, one of our teammates and a personal friend of mine – Karthik Mani – took a sudden leave of absence. All of us were aware of the tough times his young nephew was going through. The kid’s liver was destroyed beyond the limit at which the liver could regenerate itself if surgically operated on. (Btw, I learnt that liver is the one of the rarest of rare human organs that can grow back after surgery – provided there is a minimum amount left). The only hope was a liver transplant – and there was a long queue for that. Not to speak of the complications that a large tumor might have on a kid’s liver’s shape and position – thereby making a transplant potentially impossible.

Eventually, there was a donor found and since this had to be done in matter of hours, he took the first flight to be by his nephew’s side as they started the surgery. Almost eight hours of surgery later, it was a grand success.

And that is when my friend wrote to all of us a quick email to thank us for our concerns thru what turned out to be a picture perfect surgery. But that is not what caught my attention. It is how he ended the email that captivated me. With his permission, I have copied his exact words here…

”
With most organ transplant, it is always somebody’s misfortune that is your good fortune. All we can do is pray for them and say thank you!
”

I was stunned by his magnanimity. Like everybody else, I was so overjoyed by the good news that I could think no further. And here was my friend, who paused to think the other side of the coin.

And it dawned upon me then that the donor had to be in a age group close to my friend’s nephew. Which would mean some parents lost a young son or daughter. In all likelihood, in a terrible way.

And that it is when I was frozen. I got that lump in my throat thinking about those parents. What an unthinkable loss. And then in a minute my mind went back to my friend. What a great perspective he had.

How many of us really pause to think the other side of the coin? And yet, there is almost always another side to everything. Truly understanding both sides probably gives us the best perspective of anything.

I have always maintained that in life, I have risen to whatever I have risen to because of some strong shoulders people around me have lent me to step on. A couple of weeks back, I realized how broad my friend’s shoulders were.

Thank you, Karthik Mani, for setting yet another example for me. If not anything else, you have made an organ donor out of me. We can be of tremendous value even after we die.

There was just one more box to be packed as I cleaned out my office. My mind was going over the fond memories of seven years when I heard a gentle knock. Our newest intern was at the door. “You were doing so well, sir”, she said “why did you then decide to leave us?”.

I gathered my thoughts for a minute and replied softly “How else would I have realized how much I was appreciated here?”

Sitting in the auditorium. In less than half an hour, I go on stage as the commencement speaker for Fulton Science Academy High School graduation ceremony. Looking around, I am much more nervous than the students or the organizers.

I keep telling my mind to imagine the audience as naked and my mind keeps telling me back “Oh! Yeah? What if they think the same about you?”. And I get even more nervous 🙂