The immutable truths of social media
[Yes, this is what I do if it rains when I am supposed to be motorbiking outside đ ]
âLaw of first reader advantageâ STATES
The reader, upon reading a joke for the first time in his or her life, will immediately conclude that nobody else has ever heard that joke before ever.
âCorollary to the above lawâ (what is good for the goose is good for the geese) STATES
A reader, upon receiving a joke in one group, will immediately conclude that no other group has ever seen that joke before either.
âLaw of overreactionâ (Newton was wrong. Reaction is always greater than action) STATES
Upon such conclusion, the reader will venture to remove the worldâs ignorance around that joke post haste by posting it to everybody with disproportionate haste.
âLaw of false equivalencyâ STATES
What holds good for jokes holds good for hoaxes too.
âLaw of positive correlationâ STATES
Everything else remaining the same, more sensational the hoax, more gullible the reader will be. And faster the hoax will be posted to everybody else.
âLaw of washing handsâ STATES
When pulled up for spreading hoaxes, the reader will simply put a âForwarded as receivedâ disclaimer. Upon which the âLaw of first reader advantageâ will kick in.
Care to add some more of yours? đ
âLaw of Alzheimerâ – The above mentioned reader assumes all other members of every group he is a part of have advanced stage of Alzheimerâs disease so they donât remember jokes he forwarded more than 24Hr ago and he can forward them again.
Law of Insatiation. The marginal âlikeâ will always make the original âreaderâ feel better.
Hence, QED.
Law of Slow News Day in RR Land
“Law of Unproductive Necessity” STATES
Anyone who has at least once used Social Media becomes addictively unproductive towards the bigger picture in their life, with a few exceptions as is in any law: however, there is always the brighter side like getting a bit relaxed after a workful day and being able to reach likeminded people anywhere anytime!