16 July 2014

The Divided States of America

Evidently, this November, California will be voting on whether to divide itself into six states. And one of those new states will be called Silicon Valley! Reading this, of course, I had one of those “Whiskey Tango Foxtrot” moments. Did I totally miss some news like US was occupying California for fourteen years and now the military is going to withdraw or something? 🙂

I think all states should vote whether they should split up then. Here are some that I can think of. Why don’t you add your own?

1. The state of Oklahoma is divided east-west and are called “Not OK” and “Absolutely Not OK” 🙂
2. The state of Alabama similarly will be divided north-south and called “People’s Republic of Redneckistan” and “Overgrown Lawn of Redneckistan” 🙂
3. Florida should be divided into three states by latitudes running thru Lake Okeechobee and Ft. Myers. They will be simply called “Eighty and above”, “Ninety and above” and “Hundred and above” 🙂
4. The alternate-lifestyle friendly state of Maryland similarly can be carved up into two states. The new state can be called Johnland. The remaining can still be called Maryland 🙂
5. Alaska will be divided into the monarchy states of Alaska (ruled by Sarah Palin) and Alaskim (ruled by John McCain)
6. New Jersey will be divided into two states – “New India” and “Three
White Guys”
7. Texas, being Texas, has to be different. I am sure it will vote to stay as a single state although it will go with a more appropriate name like “North Mexico” or something… 😉

You want to fill in for the other 42 states?



Posted July 16, 2014 by Rajib Roy in category "Humor

25 COMMENTS :

  4. By Rajib Roy on

    Love the ideas from Dhananjay, Vijay and Narayan. Narayan, I had no idea you could simply wis away Wisconsin 🙂

    Reply ↓
  5. By Al Blake on

    Nooooo! We don’t need more states (although I did think 3 white guys was funny 🙂 ) more states means more senators and we sure don’t need any more politicians! 😀

    Reply ↓
  6. By Rajib Roy on

    Al, maybe we should tell them that they can split as long as they vote in only female senators. That way we can have happy go merry debates in Congress with those three days of intense negotiations every month. 😉 (Okay, I am going to be in deep trouble with half my FB friends now 🙂 )

    Reply ↓
  8. By Ananda Rakhit on

    See the attitude of Mizoram and Tripura being irrelevant transported. This is the United States of America not America. States have enormous power and rights and at the founding smaller states agreed to join the Union with the guarantee of equal rights as New York. Good, otherwise fracking will be banned in North Dakota and we will not be this close to energy independence and a manufacturing revival stateside as energy becomes significantly cheaper than China.

    Reply ↓
  20. By Ram Narayanan on

    …speaking of that – even the rental car companies are consolidating… to start, the 51st one had better be the State of Confusion…

    Reply ↓
  21. By Bratin Saha on

    New York could 3 more apart from its 10…Manhattan,Bronx, Brooklyn, Queens..too crowded and need some focus…

    Reply ↓

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