Nikispeak: A storage disk
In Miami airport, we were walking around when I came across a picture of an old 3.5inch disk. Showing it to Nikita, I explained – “Believe it or not, in the 1990s, this is how we stored data. Each one of them could store 1.4MB of data. Put in todays’s terms – just to store ONE of your iPhone pictures, you would need three or four of them. For one photo!!!”
Nikita weighed in what she had heard and said wisely “That just proves one thing…”
Expecting her to comment on the rapid progress of technology, I asked “What?”
Pat came the reply – “That you are really old, Dad”.
Touche!!
Off to experience some family moments
Natasha is still in New York. She decided not to come home this long weekend. She is also not a beach person. So, it is Sharmila, Nikita and myself only for this family vacation. To an island country in the Caribbean full of beaches. A pretty small country actually. Lengthwise, they cannot hold a marathon run without asking you to turn around from the other side. Width wise, it is shorter than the race we did last Saturday.
Any guesses where we are off to? Here is one hint: Don’t forget Irma and Maria!!
From the bartender’s corner – Vancouver
This is a rather uncommon gin cocktail. It is a close cousin of the very traditional Martinez. Instead of maraschino liqueur, the twist in this drink is the Benedictine. This drink was created in the middle of last century in Sylvia Hotel overlooking the English Bay in Vancouver.
The ingredients include gin, sweet vermouth, Benedictine and orange bitters.
The phone call
Finally, he moved.
Gently, he opened his eyes.
And then slowly, turned towards me.
That was a welcome change of pace. I had come half an hour back to spend time with Mr. Loyd (names hidden to protect privacy). As soon as I entered his room, I saw the completely bedraggled figure uneasily moving around in his bed. His beard, long and unkempt, his appearance, generally unruly, he could easily pass off as an authentic homeless person – what with his multiple layers of clothes and loose pajamas – all of which have clearly seen better days.
He had seen me and asked me to take him to the common area. He can walk by himself – albeit, very slowly. So, I had just shuffled along. He had very slowly sat down on a recliner and before I could find a place to settle myself in, he was deep in his nap. None the wiser, I just sat next to him. Frankly, at a complete loss what to do next. There were three other hospice patients around me who I did not know. One was making a constant low humming noise while rocking back and forth in a simple harmonic motion. One had her neck completely down and could not even lift it to see me. And an elderly gentleman was all the while sleeping in his wheel chair.
I just sat there – looking at Mr Loyd. Years of alcoholism had taken its toll on the body. The pictures in his room of his younger days are almost unbelievable to fathom if you looked at his visage in the present form. His motion has become sloth like. His voice very gruff. A few words escape at a time – it is like he is still very drunk.
“How are you feeling?”, I asked, moment he made eye contact with me.
He said something. Very softly.
I pulled my head towards him. “What was that?”
“I want to call my daughter”, is the best what I could understand.
“You want to talk to Grace?”, I asked. Finally, all that poring thru his life history and family members’ names in the hospice files came of use.
He nodded.
“Okay, we will go to the front desk area and call her up”, I told him.
“Will you come with me?”, he asked.
As a volunteer, you know that you are looking for those cues when you have earned the patient’s trust. He seeking me to accompany him was all the positive reinforcement I needed in an otherwise excruciating test of patience.
He slowly got up. When I offered him help to walk, he refused. So, he just shuffled along. And I went along behind him.
“Mr. Loyd, the phone is on the other side”, I said when I saw him take a turn in the opposite direction – in fact, towards his room.
“I know. I need my hat”.
I had no idea why he needed his hat to make a phone call. But I knew that logic is not the way to deal with such patients. Just let them do what they want to do. Go with the flow. As long as they do not hurt themselves or others. The whole idea is to make it a painless transition.
What do you know? He went to his room, struggled to his bed, reached out for a hat that was on his bed and then literally dove his head into it and then picked up his head upright – along with the hat.
Of course, the next five minutes was occupied plodding on to the phone which was on the other side of the building. All the while, I was chuckling at him walking with a cane and a top hat on. Very funny, I thought. I also marveled at the fact that he held the hat steady and dove his head down into it rather than holding his head up and swinging his hat on to it. Must be his mental condition, I deduced.
I am an idiot.
I realized that truism the moment we reached the phone. He reversed his motion – put his head down, took the hat out and what do you know? Inside the hat were numerous slips of paper!! One of them had his daughter’s phone number. In a flash, I realized that he stores his most precious things in his hat and he wears it around to never lose them. He recognizes that he has memory loss and that is how had adapted!!! And the strange way he wears it? To make sure the pieces of paper would not fly away!!!
I was so humbled that I could slap myself. The asymmetry of our relationship could not have been more stark. I was applying logic and efficiency at every step. And he was trying to do the best with the little ability and consciousness he had.
A few minutes later, I fished out his daughter’s number and rang the number. As the phone rang, I handed it to him. I hung around for a few seconds to make sure it was not a wrong number. (His scribbling is terribly illegible). But the moment I realized from his voice that he had his daughter on the line, I took a few steps away to give him some privacy.
I was expecting to overhear him complain about his condition, the premises, the care given to him (patients in a hospice have very little ability to logically process how much help they are being given), the money that he cannot move in his bank. Oh! Yeah! He is given to calling up a particular branch in a particular bank to move some money that he never had. To understand the greatness of humanity, you have to understand that the hospice office once explained the situation to the bank and the bank actually plays along with him – saying they are on it… so that he can get some mental peace!!
Well, as I said, I was expecting him to complain about something like he always did. But I could not help overhearing what he asked first – “Honey, were you able to get that job?”. And his response to whatever she said betrayed the fact that she had not.
As I sank in a chair a few feet away from him, I was just swept up by a flood of emotions. Here is a gentleman, knocking on the doors of death with inability to do anything for himself. And yet, when he woke up from his nap and he looked at me, his first thought was not about himself – but his daughter’s well being. He was trying to find out if she had gotten a job to support herself with.
I have no idea what the situation of his daughter is – I hope to learn as I talk more with Mr. Loyd. But I was overwhelmed by the fact that I was worrying myself about how he was going to get by his days with his physical condition, and all the time, he was worried about his daughter!!
The hat….
The pieces of paper….
The unkempt beard…
They all started shimmying in front of my eyes as I closed my eyelids to fight back a tear or two.
Once a dad. Always a dad.
From the bartender’s corner – Secret Martini
Paid the penalty for waiting till last moment..
Bengali special…
Presidential Trivia
To distract all my USA FB friends voicing their strong opinions for or against our current President’s tweets/statements on NFL players “taking the knee” (ha ha), here are some Presidential trivia questions. Hope both sides of the debate can work together to find the answers….
1. I was stunned to find out recently who our first President to have been born in a hospital was. Want to take a guess?
2. George Washington, of course, was our first President. Did you know that in both his terms, he was voted unanimously to be the President? Not a single electoral college of any party voted against him. Here is the question – which party did he represent in those two elections?
3. Kennedy, as we know was the youngest person to have been elected President. (Technically, Teddy Roosevelt became President when he was younger than Kennedy but that was not thru an election – previous President was assassinated). How about the oldest President to have been elected?
4. There has been only one President in the history of US who was a confirmed bachelor. Who was it?
5. On the other hand, there was another bachelor who was elected the President. And he married his sweetheart in White House while he was the President. In fact, even had his daughter born in the White House. Who was it?
6. We know many Presidents who have held the position multiple times. Almost always consecutively. (Of course, after Franklin Roosevelt’s 12 years of Presidency, there was a law promulgated that put a cap to 2 terms only). In fact, in the recent past, Obama, George W, Bill Clinton have been all 2 term presidents. There has been only one President who had 2 terms but not consecutively. He won, then lost a rebid and then won again the next time. Making him the only President who has 2 separate numbers for himself(like George HW Bush was 41 and his son was 43…). Who was it?
7. We have all heard about the crazy schedule of Presidents. President Obama, for example, wore the same color shirt and trousers to avoid wasting time in the morning in selecting clothes. On the other hand, there was a President that woke up every morning at 5AM only to practice piano for 2 long hours!! Who was it?
8. Being a President and being the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court are two of the highest positions in US (in fact they are the highest positions in two of the three branches – Executive, Legislative and Judiciary wings). There was one President that has the distinction of being both (of course – at different times). Do you know who it is?
9. A sitting President was once pulled over and arrested for going too fast (eventually fined too). Who was it? I will give you a hint – he was crossing the speed limit while riding a horse!!
10. There was one fortunate President who survived two consecutive attempts to assassinate him within a space of 17 days – and I say fortunate since he survived both attempts. Here is the crazy thing. Both were attempted by women. In fact, those were the only instances of a woman ever attempting to assassinate a sitting US President. Who was that President?
Bonus question:
By most accounts, Anne Royall was the first female journalist of this country. She had tried, for months, to score the first ever woman conducted interview of a US President. The President just would have nothing if it. Anne came up with a devious plan. She had found out that the President regularly swam in the Potomac early mornings. In the nude!!! So, she simply snuck up on him one morning while he was in the river, gathered all his clothes and sat on them till he would agree to an interview! Who was that hapless President (no doubt he would consider himself lucky to be in the pre-selfie era 🙂 )